Page 20 of Live Like Legends

“Nowadays I think Ariel would bitch at me for breathing incorrectly.” He ran a hand through his hair, leaving certain pieces in disarray at the top of his head. “I’m actually going to fly to Oculus, not portal.”

It was my turn to sit up. “Do what you want, but can I ask why?”

He shrugged, sighing. “It helps me think, that’s all.”

I leaned into him, kissing his cheek. “Whatever relieves some of the pressure in that handsome head of yours.” He turned to face me, and I tipped my head up to kiss his nose. “You know I would fucking murder the demons that torture your mind if I could, right?”

He kissed me softly, not rushing so that the moment felt like hours instead of seconds. “I know.”

I slithered back into the covers and closed my eyes, feeling the bed dip when he kicked his legs over the side and got up. He tried to be as quiet as possible as he got himself dressed to leave. My eyes popped open when I heard him clear his throat.

“Do you want to come with me?”

I bit the inside of my cheek, attempting to keep my smile to myself. I shook my head. “You go. I’ll be here when you get back.”

He smirked at me from his place near the door. “Will I find you in a compromising position, like I did that one time?”

I pulled the comforter over my mouth, muffling my giggle. “Angel or not, we both know you thoroughly enjoyed finding me getting myself off. There are probably things I’ll need from you Nicholas, but that’s not always one of them.” I rolled over so that I was facing the wall, but I knew he was narrowing his eyes at me. “And do not act like you didn’t close the door and watch me finish, happier than ever.”

“For the love of all that is ethereal, you are annoying.” I heard him open up the door, the tiny creaking noise it made echoing as he was starting to close it.

“But…you love me.”

The creaking stopped. “Yes, I love you. Always.” I heard footsteps quickly before I felt a body looming over me. He grabbed my face, turning it so he could connect his mouth with mine, landing three solid kisses against my lips.

The door closed behind him and I stared up at the ceiling. When Nick was next to me, I fell asleep without issue, my body happily snuggled against his. When Nick was gone, sleep evaded me, not for my lack of trying. I used to be able to get to sleep just fine regardless of who I had in my bed, but things were different now. The ceiling started to blur as my tiredness began to take over.

Vivid images seared across my mind, blurring and then appearing in perfect color. These weren’t the kind of dreams I liked as I tried to pull my eyes open. This wasn’t like what Nick had described his nightmares as; this was strange, and it felt like it was pulsing into the fiber of my being. I didn’t see all the bad things I’d done, the copious amounts of blood I’d spilled. I saw a face, a face of pure confidence and power. It was a face I never wanted to see again, yet here it was staring right at me as if he was in the room with me.

I was right there in his office, the same scene playing over and over. The words were muddled as if the sound was distorted. The only thing that mattered at that moment were the actions and I was glued to where I stood, forced to watch. Dimitri sliced down Nick’s arm with his elongated nails and blood leaked from my angel’s arm. It looked like so much more than before. Thick, red liquid spilled out onto the demon’s desk and the floor. This felt so much worse than when Lilith had infiltrated my mind. That felt real, but I knew it wasn’t. I didn’t know what this was at all, but I knew I hated every minute of it.

The scene replayed over and over. Dimitri would slice at his arm; blood would spill, and the Son of Hell would put his blood to his tongue and stare at me. Dimitri didn’t have the means to slip into my mind, so this whole thing was my doing. Maybe I still somehow blamed myself for bringing him along and causing him unnecessary pain. I wanted this shit to stop. I felt my darkness wanting to unravel, but then right next to it, I felt the heat in my palms. It was foreign but not unwelcome. I screamed,but no sound came out, but then I jolted up from my place in bed.

My chest heaved, my skin feeling soaked in sweat. I looked around the room, making sure that I was back where I felt comfortable and safe. I ran a hand through my curls, moving most of them off my neck, so I could expose my skin to the cool air. I brought my knees up to my chest, looking over to the door, silently wishing to have Nick’s comforting body next to me. My eyes looked up at the window and something in my gut told me things had to start moving quicker than I would have liked. There was a familiar darkness that seemed to ripple across the sky, clouding the moon and then it was gone, as if it was only meant for me to see and speculate on. I could only mark that as a bad sign, meaning that I wasn’t as hidden here as my angel would have liked. I would keep my eyes open and alert from now on because for me to see that kind of visual dark power so casually only meant things weren’t so forgiving back home—not that I thought they would be. As much as I enjoyed our little love bubble, I unfortunately needed to be the one to pop it and get back to what I did best.

I looked around the bed, a small gasp leaving me when my eyes connected with the small space next to my pillow. There was a handprint that matched my own burned into the mattress.

I brought my hand to my face, the moonlight from the window giving me a small amount of backlight. My small hand looked normal, a simple hand that used to wield a blade made just for me and created shadows at my will. Now there was no blade, but I had so much more than my shadows. I placed my hand in the space I’d burned through, and my chest swelled with a weird sort of pride at what I could do.

My light liked Nick, it wanted to protect him, just as much as it wanted to protect me. Intimate moments with Nick were just a small way for the light to grow and form a better connectionwith another source of light that was so readily available, but as much as I loved Nick, he couldn’t be my only viable option. I put my hand out in front of my face and focused hard on whatever feeling I’d had before, pulled deeply from that place that haunted me. I wasn’t afraid or scared, but to be vulnerable with Nick was one thing, but seeking that same vulnerability when it was just me, myself and I was daunting sometimes.

My palm burned, but it was a good burn. It was a burn that didn’t settle in one place. I felt a warmth that I seemed to already know; it was like a solace I didn’t know existed. Tiny sparks sprung from my fingertips and just as quickly as they came, they were gone. Disappointment didn’t come because progress was all that mattered. Perhaps Nick’s lightcouldmake me stronger, but I was already strong without him. I’ve always been strong without him. Ariel didn’t need to make me protect people under the guise of his ‘leadership’because that’s what I’d always planned to do. Light didn’t suddenly make me good; it just made me more dangerous in the eyes of a fuck ton of people here. Whether I was deemed dead or alive, whether Dimitri or Lilith came roaming around, Iwouldlearn to trust any sort of power I had before I left the people I cared about defenseless. I would burn the realms down for any of them.

The resilient sparks from my fingers proved it. I wanted more than just sparks. I wanted a goddamn explosion.

Ilanded in Oculus with a kind of quiet surrounding me. The flight over here was helpful for my mind and thoughts. I liked the wind hitting my face and the feeling of limitless direction. I nearly flew right over my destination because I was so involved in my own thinking. I hated being away from Dani, no matter where I had to go and its importance, but I had promised Reese I would meet him, and the guy was still my best friend.

I was starting to understand that Dani, despite our connection and the love we both had for each other, needed her space. I fuckinghatedit, but I was slowly coming to terms with it. I had flown as close to Natalia’s house as I could, realizing that no one could miss her giant home due to the small lights adorning the balconies and around the roof. Reese sat on the steps right outside, drumming his fingers on his knees.

He lifted his head up when he heard my footsteps, quickly hustling down the steps to meet me halfway. “So, how’s the girlfriend?”

I rolled my eyes, not in the mood to correct him. “She’s fine. Frustrated over something she doesn’t even understand.”

Reese hummed, nodding towards the house for me to follow him inside. “Putting all the things I’ve said about her aside, I do think Ariel, the whole Dimitri-Lilith combo and you know pretty much dying can be a mind fuck, so from where I’m standing, she’s doing pretty okay.”

“Did you just pay her a compliment?”

He made a shooing motion with his hand, dismissing my comment. “I never said I didn’t like her, Nick. I just didn’t trust her. Now well, you guys are like practically married so…”

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