Page 13 of The Blood Crown

Because she did.

She wouldn’t have had to replay the look of relief in her mother’s beautiful green eyes over and over. Knowing she’d put her through so much pain and loss, not once, but twice now. Asher wouldn’t have followed her, he wouldn’t have—

She cut off the thought as she had hundreds of times, trying to blink back tears, but her throat was thick with grief, her tongue heavy with the bitter taste of regret.

Pulling the heavy ring from her breast pocket, she relished in the sting of the metal against her skin. At least this was one thing she’d done right.

Warm tears leaked from her eyes, instantly turning cold in the chill of the cave as she huddled into herself.

A heavy warmth settled across her body, and a moment later Ven tugged her back against his chest, the steady beat of hisheart slowing her own racing rhythm. It only made the tears fall faster as she finally gave in to her grief.

Seeming to read her thoughts in that unnerving way of his, his voice was like velvet against the darkness as he whispered, “I dream of her still—my mother. Sometimes it is of her laughing and smiling, like a memory replaying from childhood. Other times . . . I have to witness her death over and over again, standing helpless and silent as she is slain before my eyes.”

She couldn’t find her voice to respond, even to the truth that he had laid bare, but it didn’t seem to matter as she felt his warm breath against the nape of her neck, his large hand covering the one that was still clenched to her chest.

"I shouldn't have gone back," she uttered. "If I'd stayed in Ravenstone—let Karro or Nira dole out justice for me—it would have been cleaner."

“You saved them. Had you not risked your own life, the lives of many others would have been forfeit. And I know the sacrifice you gave, Aurelia.” The deep rumble of his voice caressed her ear as he whispered, “If you choose to bear the burden of every evil deed in this world, you will eventually crumble under the weight of it.”

More tears spilled from the corners of her eyes. She couldn't bring herself to face him, but his solid warmth enveloping her was the only thing keeping her from shattering apart entirely.

Chapter 6

The next day passed without event, for better or for worse, as they slowly chipped away at the vast distance between them and the black gates of Ravenstone.

Aurelia awoke sore and stiff, but the pain was welcome. The thirst was worse, but she found she could ignore it after a while, lying to Ven when he quietly offered his blood to her. If she felt hunger like this, he must be ravenous, and if they encountered anything on their journey he would need his strength more than she did.

Despite the quiet and the sunlight, Ven and Karro were both on edge, not speaking much unless it was necessary. Aurelia followed their lead, but it only left her with the muddied mess of her thoughts raging like an endless torrent. This bone-numbing sadness. A deep well of emptiness, spiraling down, down, down. She hadn’t felt like this since—

Since her life had gone up in flames. Since she’d discovered that she wasn’t human and there was an entire world that she'd been ignorant to just beyond the edge of the Valley. Since she’d realized she was a threat to the people she loved most.

Except she’d gone back. She’d given up the small semblance of an existence that she had carved out for herself in the Blood Kingdom hoping that it would all be worth the sacrifice when she finally went back to her life.

The words she had silently spoken to herself over and over like a prayer, like an incantation, when she’d returned to the human realm. Playing the pretty, smiling girl on Bastien’s arm. Asking the Wraiths to sacrifice themselves keeping the border safe while she uncovered her father’s murderer. Lying to everyone she loved instead of letting them move on with their lives without her. That all of it—all of it— had somehow been worth it.

And she wasn’t sure that it had been.

She felt for the heavy weight of the ring in her pocket, counting down the minutes, days, until she could be rid of it. Once they returned to Ravenstone, Seth would make sure the relic remained hidden and safe.

Dropping her hand again, she released a breath, focusing once more on the burn of her thighs as they climbed further into the Shades.

The ground grew more treacherous every day, but they kept an unrelenting pace. The thought of the roaring fireplace on the second floor of the library kept her going. She could imagine exactly how wonderful it would feel to sink into a hot bath in the black stone tub in her chambers—Ven’s chambers, she reminded herself.

How many times had she fallen asleep in his large bed? Taken the books from his shelves and curled up by the fire to read with a cup of coffee?

Would he ask her to find new chambers? Should she offer?

The comfort he had given her last night had been a kindness, but she didn’t know where they stood now. Heat crept up her neck at the memory of his whispered words in the Crystal City.

If you still want this when we return—I’ll gladly oblige.

Aurelia stumbled, losing her footing for a moment. Ven turned, grasping her arm and helping her out of the hole she’d fallen into.

“Thank you,” she said, glancing up to where he stood in front of her, a blush staining her cheeks at the thought that had caused her to stumble, but his eyes were fixed on the ground at her feet.

She looked down at the large imprint that had swallowed up her boot. Five claw marks dug away the earth, a paw print the diameter of her head.

Ven’s mouth was a tight line as he studied the tracks.

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