Page 30 of Free

I reach out, cupping his cheek with one hand. His skin is clammy, damp with sweat, and his jaw quivers under my palm. “Hey. Hey now. It’s okay. That was just a car backfiring. Look at me.”

Nothing.

I try again, letting my voice drop into the soothing tone Angela uses with Elise. “You’re safe, Nick. We’re sitting in your truck, at the beach, about to get ice cream with your cousins. You’re safe. I’m here.”

His eyes flick toward me, a moment of recognition breaking through the haze. “Charlie?” His voice is raw, broken.

“Yeah, it’s me.” I keep my hand on his cheek, grounding him. “Focus on me, okay? You’re safe. Just breathe with me.”

Nick closes his eyes, his lashes fluttering against his cheeks as he drags in a shuddering breath, then another. I can see the effort it takes to pull himself out of wherever he was trapped. Slowly, his grip on the steering wheel loosens, and his shoulders sag.

“I thought…” He swallows hard, the muscles in his throat working against the lump there. “I thought something bad happened.”

I want to ask him what he thought, but the answer seems obvious enough. The explosion. The landmine. The memories he carries like shrapnel embedded in his soul.

“It didn’t,” I say firmly. “You’re here. We’re okay. It was just a car.”

Ivy notices us through the windshield, her brows drawing together in concern. I wave her off, mouthing,We’re fine,though I’m not entirely sure it’s true.

Nick leans back against the headrest, his eyes closed as he gulps in slow, measured breaths. His face is still pale, his lips pressed together in a thin line.

I unbuckle my seat belt and slide over the center console, tucking myself under his arm. His body is tense, vibrating with leftover adrenaline, but I hold him tightly, hoping the contact will anchor him.

“Seems like every time we get in this truck together, one of us ends up taking care of the other,” he says after a few minutes, his voice shaky but tinged with humor.

“Thank goodness for that,” I reply, pressing my cheek to his chest.

He huffs a weak laugh, and I can feel the tension gradually leaving his body.

“You okay?” I ask, tilting my head to look up at him.

“I’m fine.”

He’s not fine. I know he’s not fine. But I decide not to push, at least not right now.

“Still feel like getting ice cream?”

He nods slowly. “Just give me a minute.”

I wait, listening to the rhythm of his breathing steadying against my ear. “I can take you home if you want,” I offer gently.

“I don’t wanna go home.” His voice is firmer now. “Everything’s fine.”

He doesn’t look fine. He looks scared out of his mind. He looks haunted. He gulps breath deep into his lungs as he closes his eyes, like he’s willing himself back into the right time and place.

I know what Nick experienced over there was awful. I know he has scars on his body, heart, and mind.

This is the first time I’ve seen how deeply they still run.

Nick looks away, out the window, watching as the backfiring car trundles out of its spot, old man waving on his way, oblivious to the drama playing out beside him. “I, uh… I feel like you should know this. I don’t always know how I’ll respond during an, um, an episode. I don’t want to hurt you. Maybe don’t touch me? If it happens again?” He drops his head into his hand. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize, Nick. Tell me what you need. Teach me to help the right way and I will.”

“Everything else was fine. Soothing tones. Help me reorient. Just please, I’ll never forgive myself if I hurt you…”

I nod and he swallows hard before offering a smile that looks more like his. “If we wait too much longer, they’re gonna send Ivy out here, and she’ll drive my ass straight to the ER. She doesn’t mess around when it comes to this trauma shit.”

“Maybe you should listen to her?”

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