Page 27 of Defending What is Mine

“I’m about to get on a plane and leave the country. For months. Something I’ve done a half-dozen times before. But now? It all feels different.”

“How so?” I ask, nervous to hear the answer.

“Because of you.” Jack turns back to Vanessa and smiles. “And you, too. Obviously.”

When Vanessa smiles at the compliment, Jack continues. “I think… No.” He pauses, quickly glances at the backseat again, then returns his attention to the blur of sights streaming past his window. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to say this for days. And in case anyone is keeping score, this is not the way I had worked it out in my head…” Jack gives his attention to me, his eyes warm and swimming with emotion. “I think I’m falling in love.”

I jerk the wheel. “What!?” I ask sharply, as I steer the car back into our lane before we side-swipe the red sedan next to us. An angry looking, whitehaired man lays on his horn as he speeds away. “Sorry. Sorry about that. I’ve got this. Just a momentary loss of control.” I look at Jack. “Are you being serious right now? Or is this one of those jokes you and your brothers make with each other that no one else understands?”

“Hey, now. Don’t go lumping me in with Gabe and Hank.” Jack turns back to me and smiles. “I’m as serious as I’ve ever been about anything in my life.”

My head bobs along with his words. “Okay, well uh…not to seem too forward, but do you know who with?”

“You, silly. You probably think I’m losing my mind, or making a fool of myself here, but that’s the way I feel. One hundred percent.”

So many thoughts race through my head, I feel paralyzed. Unable to speak. My heart is overflowing with joy. I want to hug him. I want to laugh. I want to cry. I want to tell him I feel the same way. But for some reason I can’t get the words to come. As seconds continue ticking by, the only sound in the car comes from the radio (and the awkward tension settling in between us.)

Finally, Vanessa breaks the silence in that way only children seem capable of. “Mommy loves you too. I hear her talking to Aunt Mollie about it all the time.”

“What? Nessa!” Thanks for that little girl. Next year, for your birthday, I’m getting you a rock.

I look over to find Jack’s eyebrows almost touching his hairline when he processes Vanessa’s admission. Instantly forgetting about me, he turns back to her and begs her to tell him more. Though when she sees my famous that’s enoughof that warning face, she opts to go silent.

Message received.

“Mmm-hmm. I see how it is,” Jack says at last. “I confide my innermost thoughts and feelings with you and I get nothing in return. Not even a ‘thanks, that’s nice? Or an, ‘I love spending time with you too?’”

“I do love spending time with you, too. A lot.” I flip on my turn signal before merging into the exit lane for the airport. “I may have mentioned something about the L-word to Mollie a time or two. But in my defense that was meant to be a private conversation,” I say as I glimpse Vanessa through the mirror again.

“So?” Jack’s brows are raised and his eyes wide.

“So?”

“So? What do we do now?” he asks with a shrug.

I bite my bottom lip. It’s a bad habit…of Mollie’s. One that, apparently, I’ve decided now is the perfect time to adopt. “I don’t suppose there’s any way you can call in sick?”

Jack shrugs and runs a hand through his hair. “Sadly, no. Even if I did, they’d just order me to report to the nearest med center for an exam. That’s what I always tell the young bucks who panic before their first deployment.”

When we come to a stop at the end of the exit ramp, I decide to take the opportunity to turn to Jack and share my fears. The tears begin to flow before a word is spoken. “In case it isn’t clear, I’m falling in love with you, too, and as wonderful as it is, I’m scared. What can we do? I don’t want this to be the end. I…it…I just don’t know what to do. You’re leaving and that’s that.”

Jack takes my hand in his, and places it over his heart. “Then it won’t end. This belongs to you now, I’m just keeping it safe. If you still want it when I come home, it’s all yours.”

Forget flowing tears, now we’re dealing with a geyser—and I’m talking, Old Faithful level eruption. “Of course, I’ll still want it. But the real question is, will you still want me? Us?”

The light turns green, and the car behind politely taps its horn, but when Jack’s eyes well up, I’m not going anywhere. Not yet.

“Sam, the way I feel about you won’t change. Of that, I have no doubt. But I can’t ask you to wait. It’s not fair to you. Either of you. I’ve still got six months left on my tour. And that’s a long time, especially for someone you’ve only known a couple weeks.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m not going anywhere. But you…you have your life all mapped out. The last thing you need is a woman and a child holding you back from your dreams.”

“It’s not like that. Hey, please look at me.” Several other cars are now joining in on the honking—less politely than the first I might add. Jack clears his throat. “Uh, I guess we should probably go.”

But I don’t go. I don’t even bother to roll my window down and give the one finger salute. Not because I don’t want to, but because I already know this is one of those moments. The kind you look back on for years to come. I can feel it.

Why?

Because a man I care for from the depths of my soul just confessed that he feels the same. Uh, yeah you can honk all you want. Assholes.

---