“Well Gabe here is planning to…”

Thankfully, our younger brother Jack opens the door, interrupting Frank. He quietly steps into the room and pushes the door closed behind him. When he looks up and finds the three of us staring blankly at him, he rocks back on his heel.

“Am I interrupting?”

I step forward, grateful for a topic change. “No, no. Nothing important. What’s up?”

Jack looks at Chet. “The reverend asked me to tell you it’s time. Are you ready?”

“As much as I’m going to be.” Chet walks to the mirror to look himself over.

Jack clears his throat. “One thing, Chet—and I’m sorry to have to say it, but I thought you’d want to prepare yourself.”

“Yeah?” Chet asks.

Chet and Jack are cut from the same cloth, so if Jack felt it was important enough to mention, minutes before the service starts, we all know whatever he’s about to say, must be.

“Well. Leo’s here.”

“That’s good news, right?” Frank asks, trying to lighten the mood as he looks around the room. “I saw him come in, but I haven’t had a chance to speak to him, yet.”

“Well, ordinarily, it would be. Uh…the thing is…” Jack stares at his feet.

“Spit it out, man,” I say, bracing myself.

Jack looks Chet in the eye. “Well, I’m ninety-nine percent sure he’s half in the bag.”

“Sh-it.” The word slips out without me realizing I’m the one who said it.

Frank grimaces at me before turning to Jack. “That doesn’t make sense. I mean…Leo’s always been impetuous. But, I hardly think he would disrespect a day like today.”

“I hope I’m wrong. Judging by his bloodshot eyes and slurred words, I don’t think I am.”

I look to Chet. “Alright. So what? Today isn’t about Leo, it’s about you and Christy. So, he’s a selfish prick? That’s not news. Don’t give it another thought. Jack, Frank, and I will keep an eye on him. Hell, Hank too if things go that far, but—” I laugh “—how bad could he be? You focus on your bride. Today is about the two of you.” I turn for the door. “Are we ready?”

When no one answers, I look back confused by their silence, only to find the three of them standing around staring at each other. “What? I told you, I can be serious.” I push my right lapel out with my thumb. “See this badge?”

All three of my brothers shake their heads. “Jesus, have a little imagination for once in your lives and pretend there’s a badge. As I was saying, it reads best man, not good man. Now come on, let’s get you hitched before the Valium wears off the bride.”