Page 23 of As Angels Sin

“There comes a time in every man’s life...” He looks at me and shakes his head. “Everyperson’slife, where the reality of death settles in. Until recently, it never felt as if it would come my way, but these days, it’s hard to say how long I’ve got left.” Father lifts a hand to his face and pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m worried that it won’t be much longer now, Fiametta. Not so short a time that I won’t be able to see you down the aisle—”did he really have to bring that up right now?“…but not long enough to see my grandkids.”

“What’s got you thinking this craziness?” It’s the only thing I can think of to say.

“Reality, my darling daughter. The hard kick in the nuts that is reality,” Father speaks with a smile, as if this conversation isn’t about his facing an untimely death.

“Do you mind if I ask what’s put you on edge?” I venture.

He never shares our family secrets with me, and until this moment he has never been this candid about his emotions either.I love youwas reserved for deaths in the family and an occasional Christmas dinner. The latter came to a screeching halt after I turned twenty.

“Not at all,” he sips from the champagne flute that sits beside him, “Because I can’t answer you.”

“Can’t or won’t?”

“Can’t. I don’t know. The air, I guess? It’s heavy. It reeks of despair. It’s almost as if there’s a storm in the distance and I have felt the early warning signs. Maybe it’s nothing, maybe it’s everything, but I don’t want to risk it.” He takes another swig and polishes off the glass.

“Is there any reason why you feel that now?”

His shoulders sag and he turns back to the sky. It’s darker now, and lacks the colors it held when I first stepped outside. But it’s still beautiful, none-the-less.

“Because I’ve wasted so much time, Fiametta. I’ve kept you at arm’s length to keep you safe, only to discover you were never out of someone else’s reach. I focused on one family and neglected the other. I raised you as a prisoner, and continue to treat you as one to this day. I’ve done so many bad things, so I won’t ignore an opportunity to say I’m sorry, before the inevitable hand of death comes to guide me away.”

Right. There’s no holding back my tears this time. They’re spilling freely, and are exacerbated by every new point he makes. I’d take the hard, mean man I know over this softy, waiting for death, any day.

“I know you can’t see it yet, Fia. And I know it’s going to ruin the point I’m trying to bring across, but that’s why I set up your engagement to Tomas.”

He’s right, that makes me want to cry in a very different way.

“I need you to trust me on this one. No fighting and no fear. Tomas is the right man for the job.” I don’t say anything, because it won’t be what he wants to hear. “So, there it is. My heart spilled out onto a silver platter. I’m sorry, my daughter. My pride, my joy. If I could go back, I’d do things differently, but I can’t. I hope you can forgive me.”

“I can.” I swallow a lump in my throat and fight away the tears with my trustee wrist technique. “And I do.”

He smiles.

“I’ve decided to lower your restrictions, now that I have Crue on guard duty.” Just like that, he’s back to his normal, straight-laced tone. “You can go back to work, to the soup kitchen, to anywhere else you’d like to go, as long as you promise to take him with.”

Could it be? Freedom once more? Well, the same kind I had before Father locked me in the mansion. But something tells me that Crue’s going to be a lot more fun than Tomas was, chasing me around the city.

“You’re serious?” I have to actively hold my jaw shut to keep it from falling to the floor.

“I am. And where I won’t expect you to move in with him the same way I had you do with Tomas; I’d urge you to consider it. I would be comforted to know that he is watching you, dayandnight.”

Father lifts the bottle of champagne out of an ice bucket that is at his side and pours himself another glass. He offers one to me without words, and I decline by shaking my head.

I can’t believe it. I thought I’d be stuck here for the rest of my life, and in the blink of an eye all my prayers have been answered instead.

There are two things left to do before I can allow myself a momentary jump for joy.

Tell Crue the good news, and find out if I’m pregnant.

Chapter Eleven

CRUE

We are just staring at the walls, when we should be splattering them with red. What the hell are you doing?

My shadow isn’t much of a wordsmith. It tries, but as a construct of my own mind, its vocabulary is lacking, which is understandable. I’m no poet, and there are a thousand better ways to express a kill, but at least it’s trying. And winning. I shouldn’t be here. I don’t even know why I am. This house is a nightmare of delirium and delusion. If I don’t get out soon, it might swallow me whole.

“She wants me to stay, so I’ll stay,” I whisper. Fiametta could return any second now, and I’d hate for her to see me talking to myself.

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