Page 3 of Hollyhocks

I stare at him, inhaling as deeply as possible, but breathing is becoming too hard. I gasp again.

And again.

My vision blurs. My breathing begins to slow. I sink into the table as my body becomes weightless.

I know this feeling. I think… I think it may be peace.

Once the scalpel touches my skin so he can slice me from ear to ear to end my misery, I end myself.

I focus on the ceiling. The fluorescent lights no longer bother me as my sight becomes darker. Water stains pool in the corner of the tiled ceiling. Dust sticks to the lightbulbs. Every small detail becomes stark in the midst of death.

My life doesn’t flash before my eyes as I can’t remember the majority of it, but I do think of dancing, and the happiness it brought me fills my chest for one last time as my lungs exhale their very last breath.

“That’s it. Die. Stop wasting my space so I can have room for real subjects,” he whispers into my ear.

Even though they are the last words I hear, I can’t help but smile with relief knowing my journey here is over. There’s no more pain. My skin doesn’t burn. I own myself again in death. My body is mine once more.

I’m free.

The ghost of me stands away, staring down at my limp body. It’s the first time I’ve gotten to see myself.

The horns are bigger than what I thought. They are black and the very tips curl over my skull. I have a tail that is thin with a pointed tip that is wrapped around my leg. My hair is long and blue, which I don’t mind at all. I like it.

I look down at my hands, flipping them over to analyze the purple skin. I’m a little in awe. I’m torn between liking what I see and what I could have been, and hating what they have made me become. Even my memory is altered. Who I used to be died the moment they kidnapped me.

I’ve lost myself. I don’t know who I am anymore.

“Don’t like what you see?”

I gasp and jump back, seeing a skeletal figure standing next to me. I take another step back to get as far away from him as possible. I just want to be left alone. Can’t a woman die in peace?

“I’m not here to hurt you. I’m here to take you to your next destination. Your soul doesn’t belong here anymore.”

I’m skeptical but any place has to be better than here. “Who are you?”

“Trovian. Also known as one of Death’s Voids. I’m new. Recently promoted to soul reaping.” He puffs out his chest with pride, and I lift a brow.

“Excuse me? What? I don’t know what that means.”

“I’ll explain along the way. Unless you want to wait and see what they do with your body.”

“I’d rather not know.” I swallow, taking one last glance at my body as Glasses loosens the straps.

Trovian cuts off a piece of his shadow and wraps it around my shoulders to cover me. He holds out his hand, the bones long and slender while his palm is wide.

“Let’s go home.”

My eyes burn with the emotion I’ve been holding back for months. Am I finally able to mourn what has happened to me?

“Your life here is over, Holly. Take my hand and you’ll never see these people again.”

A tear finally falls, the warmth rolling down my cheek to remind me that my pain is justified. I take one last look at Glasses throwing my body over his shoulder to dump itsomewhere, and as I stare longer at my physical form, I happen to like what I see.

Wherever I am going, I can learn more about myself there. I’ll accept myself in time.

I slip my hand in Trovian’s and his bones curl around my fingers. To my shock, it isn’t uncomfortable, and it doesn’t hurt.

He stares down at me with his black, empty eyes, and smiles before snapping his fingers.

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