Page 64 of Both Sides Now

He rolls onto his back, tucking his hand behind his head. “I knew you didn’t feel the same way, but I thought earlier … I thought it meant something. Guess you were just playing your part, right?”

I reach over to touch him, desperate to comfort him, but he tenses, so I pull my hand back. “That was no part. Trust me, I hated that you went to the strip club.Hatedit. I wanted you to be here with me.”

“Get into your knickers, huh?” Keegan shakes his head before popping out of the bed to throw on his pants.

“Where are you going?”

“The hotel bar is open for another hour. Think I’ll take advantage.”

“Would you like some company?”

He meets my gaze for the first time since he spoke those fateful words, his eyes brimming with pain. Pain I inflicted. “I’d rather fly solo if it’s all the same to you.”

I avert my gaze, my fingers knotting in the sheets. “Be careful, please.”

He throws on a t-shirt, tousling his dark hair with his fingers. “You know it.”

Once more, I tremble, but this time it’s because I ruined us before we even got started.

Keegan grabs his wallet but pauses at the door, tapping the frame with his fingers. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here. I hope you can still have fun this weekend.”

I rise from the bed, determined to halt this conversation train before it careens into darker territory. More importantly, I need to stop him from walking out that door. “Please, come back to bed. Forget the damn bar and just be with me.”

“I can’t, Calli. Not after what I said … and what you didn’t. Ishouldn’t have said a word. Blame it on the booze. I won’t mention it again. Sleep well.”

Then he’s gone, and it takes everything in me not to chase after him. Beg him back. Beg him to love me like he claims.

But I’m not that brave. Keegan Russo is gorgeous, brilliant, and completely opposed to any sort of commitment.

A commitment I crave.

Just because he loves me doesn’t mean he wants anything more. I’d be a fool to get my heart involved any deeper.

Right?

Wrong, because I’d rather be a fool than live without Keegan. When I’m with him, my loneliness vanishes.

I feel whole. Alive after so many months of feeling nothing.

I release a strangled cry into the pillow, curling into myself on the bed.

Why couldn’t I find the courage to say what I truly feel?

Keegan claims I don’t feel the same way about him.

The trouble is, I know I do.

I love him, and now, it’s too late.

Chapter

Ten

CALLISTA

Iawaken to the sun streaming through the full-length windows. Fluffy clouds dance along the bright blue sky and birds chirp on the other side of the glass.

It’s a perfect day for a wedding.

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