Page 38 of Both Sides Now

Keegan considers my question for a moment. “I haven’t.”

“Hmm.”

A smirk colors his lips. “You don’t like that response, do you?”

How in the world do I answer that?

I wave my hands, as if a retort might magically appear in the air. “Look, I get that you don’t believe in marriage and babies and all those shenanigans?—”

“I’m a big fan of shenanigans, actually,” Keegan replies with a wink.

“I’m sure you’ve had more than your share,” I concede. “But I’m looking at it from the other side of the table. You don’t believe in love, while I had a tremendous one with Charlie. I know that level of devotion exists, and I know love saved me once, so of course I recommend it.”

“A true romantic.”

“To the core, and I won’t settle for anything less. So, sadly, I may be bound for the single life, right along with you. Although, instead of busty blondes, I’ll have several cats and Domino for company.”

"And a baby. Can't forget that."

I cross my arms over my chest, hugging away the emotion that threatens to spill forth again. That nagging thought, deep in my brain, which whispers how I might not be able to fulfill Charlie’s wish.

That his legacy will end and it will be all my fault.

“If I’m able to have a baby. I had three miscarriages that I’m aware of, and likely countless more I suffered without knowing it. Maybe the universe was trying to tell me something, but I didn’t care to listen."

"It was. It was telling you to come and find me."

My breath whooshes from my lungs at Keegan’s words and I shift to meet his gaze, my entire body trembling. Deep down, that’s exactly what I feel towards the comely doctor.

That he spoke the words aloud makes my heart race with anticipation. A serendipitous match.

“You think the universe set it up for us to meet?"

He offers a nonchalant shrug, choosing to focus once again on the television behind the bar. “I do. I am the Baby Maker, after all."

My emotional high smashes onto the pub floor, as the intention behind his statement rings clear.

On that note, it’s time to stage a hasty retreat. “Quite right. You are indeed the Baby Maker. Time for you to get busy and do your job.” I pull my wallet from my purse and motion to the barkeep. “I’m at my limit for the night. I’m leading a sunrise yoga class tomorrow, and I will no doubt be a lovely shade of green for my students."

Keegan stays my hand and slides the bartender his credit card. “I’ll pay the tab. It's the least I can do after your crappy date."

"Thanks. I’ll owe you one,” I mumble, flushing at my earlier presumption.

Seriously, world, what is wrong with me? I know Keegan is unattainable, so why does my heart seize at his laid-back disposition?

I wanted him to be my friend. This is what friends do.

"No worries, Calli,” Keegan assures me. “I'm happy to be of service."

We stroll into the night, and I huddle deeper into my jacket to ward off the chill. The early spring weather from last week has left for parts unknown, leaving winter firmly in her stead.

Pausing under a streetlight, I point up the hill in the direction of my house. "I walked here, so I'm off. Thank you for sharing a drink with me. Listening to my sob story."

"I'll drive you home. Come on, I'm parked right over here."

He presses a button on his key fob and the headlights on a Jeep Wrangler blink. Surprising. I was expecting a luxury vehicle—a sleek BMW or Mercedes—not a lifted Jeep with mud on the tires.

"I must say I never pictured you driving a Jeep."

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