Page 113 of The Diary of the Vam'pir Jacques

Julia curled up in a ball, and it felt like she was trying to climb inside my skin. She burrowed into my chest and sat there for afew minutes. Julia slowly lifted her head and stared me full in the face. The madness remained, but sanity was present, too.

“I had been hunting when I came across her. Her name was Polly Nichols. I tried to avoid her, they’re diseased creatures, all of them. But Polly raised her head and looked right at me, and Kierran’s soul blazed out from her eyes. I froze, not knowing what to do.”

Julia hissed in anger.

“I wanted to flee but was drawn back. I returned and got to know Polly. She’d had such a hard life, but all I kept seeing washis soul. Jacques, Polly had five children. How unfair when we couldn’t even have one? I was not a prostitute, and yet God did not allow me to have a single child. Polly had to be punished.”

“You killed her,” I asked.

Well, it wasn’t a question. Julia had, but I needed her to confirm it.

“Oh yes, I slit Polly’s damned throat,” Julia replied gaily.

It was almost as if we were just discussing dinner or the latest ball. I felt fear.

Was Julia too far gone? Could I do something to help Julia regain sanity? Healing would take years, perhaps a lifetime.

“What else did you do?” I asked gently, not wanting to upset her.

“I slashed Polly’s womb so she could not have any more children. How could Kierran do that to me? He was mine, yet Kierran had sex with another man so he could have children. How could Kierran do that? What about my needs? Oh, they did not matter anymore, did they? I was nothing to him. Kierran didn’t even recognise me… me who had loved him all my life.”

More ranting followed, and Julia leapt up and paced again.

I couldn’t take everything in. There was too much to handle. Julia kept calling Polly Kierran and confusing the two of them.In sadness, it slowly dawned on me, that seeing Kierran’s soul in a prostitute had broken Julia.

She ranted for about another hour, and I allowed her. I sensed Julia needed to get it out of her system. I was in shock as Julia spat out detail after detail of the murders, never once showing remorse or sorrow.

Polly Nichols, had been the catalyst, and Julia felt that she needed to free all the ‘lost’ souls. In a way, I’d been correct when I assumed The Ripper was a vampire, but I hadn’t expected it to be a Vam’pir.

Julia began pulling at her hair again, and in desperation, I slapped her. That stopped her, but for a moment Julia looked at me with such hatred, I cringed.

“Sorry!” Julia exclaimed. “I didn’t mean it.”

Julia patted my face gently. Briefly, I believed Julia returned; however, her eyes retained their unsettling intensity.

“Where do we go from here?” I asked.

“You know where, Jaq. You must kill me and stop this misery I’m suffering. I will kill again, and next time, it might be an innocent like Elizabeth Barrington. Oh, I saw you and recognised her. What’s a well-heeled lady doing walking the streets of London that late?

“All I was going to do was cut Elizabeth’s womb. Why should Elizabeth damned Barrington have a chance when I didn’t?Damn you, Maurick! How could you do this to me?” Julia shrieked.

She spun around, eyes blazing.

“Maurick haunts me, Jaq. Maurick doesn’t forgive us for not accepting him. And Maurick means to kill from beyond the grave. Don’t let Maurick get me, please.”

Julia fell to her knees, sobbing.

I raised Julia’s head gently and saw that she was right. The torment Julia was suffering would never end. Julia wouldremain a tortured soul. This recent sighting of Kierran’s soul had destroyed her fragile grip on reality. She had no control over her actions.

I felt like I was dying myself at the knowledge of what I’d have to do. But I owed Julia this. I owed her the peace she craved. How long Julia had sought it, I don’t know, but we were not suicidal, not the Vam’pirs.

“Kill me. I deserve to die, and I want death. I lack the courage to die by my hand, you have to help. Save me from Maurick. He hides in the darkness and mocks me. Jacques, I am wounded, Jaq, and I cannot heal.Leave me be!”Julia hissed over my shoulder.

I turned and looked. There was nobody present, of course there wasn’t. But I couldn’t help myself.

“I want to join Kierran. Jacques, I freed his soul for that purpose, and now it is my time. Do it, do it, do it to me. Kill me and let me go. Give me your blessings. Free me from this eternal prison. I will kill that Barrington bitch, Jaq. I saw how you looked at Elizabeth. If you won’t help me, then I’ll take her and make Elizabeth bloody Barrington suffer. Worse than that little whore back there.”

“Come,” I said, taking Julia by the arm.

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