Page 199 of Irreversible

Her eyes widen. “You’ll kill him?”

“Yes. I’ll fucking kill him.” Warmth soaks into my chest before I realize I’ve picked up her hands and taken them in mine, pressing them against my heart. “I’ll kill him for you.”

Fingertips dig into my chest. Her eyes close, and when they open, the blue has gone hard as granite. “Good.”

My lips twitch.That’s my girl.

Lifting her hands to my cheeks, she looks into my eyes. “Be careful, okay? I worry about you.”

“Don’t worry. This is what I was meant for.”

I should have done it a long time ago.

46

The following evening crests, and I’m taming a stubborn curl in the mirror when there’s a knock at the door.

My heart leaps. Twists.

I swish a dirty-blond ribbon out of my eyes, then swipe my hands down the front of my heather-gray hoodie. My nerves are in knots as I wind through the living room and pull open the door.

Jasper greets me with his hands on his hips, fidgeting from loafer to loafer. “Oh… You’re not dressed up.” His gaze trails down my casual blue jeans topped with Converse sneakers before sweeping back up.

I frown. “Why would I be?”

Jasper is wearing a dress suit and a metallic cerulean tie, the scent of his cologne teasing a promise of something more formal.

He clears his throat and smiles. “No matter. You still look incredible.”

The compliment boomerangs through me like a chaotic pinball.

I used to live for his compliments, be it a favorable word or a flirtatious look. I’d dab Jasper’s favorite perfume at the spacejust below my ear—a delicate blend of honeycrisp apple and soft peony. He’d nuzzle his nose against my neck, breathe me in, and I’d laugh because it tickled.

I’m not wearing perfume tonight.

“Thank you,” I murmur, unsure how to process our new dynamic. Wavering for a beat, I reach for my purse on the wall hook and shuffle past him. “Where are we headed? There’s a cute café a few miles from here that has great coffee?—”

“I made a reservation at Kaiyo.”

I blink up at him, moving toward the exit of the complex. “Oh. That’s fancier than I expected.”

“I heard the sushi is good.”

I shouldn’t be surprised Jasper scored us reservations at a high-end location. He was always extra like that. Appearances mattered. Still, I don’t want him to get the wrong idea about tonight—this is merely a business transaction between ex-spouses, tangled in a web of complicated history, emotional damage, and heart-rending betrayal.

Totally casual.

“I hope you know this isn’t a date.” I avoid eye contact as I close the door behind me. “Regardless of how I left things with Allison, I wouldn’t do that to her.”

I wouldn’t do that to Isaac, either.

Erotic hotel memories spring to mind, dragging me farther away from Jasper. A prickle of guilt teases my heart.

What the hell are we?

Last night was a fusion of so many things: hot, dirty sex, tender moments and hard-fought intimacy, big reveals and confusing goodbyes. For all the things we discussed, putting a label on our complex relationship was not one of the topics.

Oddly enough…I kind of like that.

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