Page 178 of Catch the Sun

“Thank you. It was pretty cool.”

“Don’t listen to him.” Brynn shoves at his shoulder with hers. “It wasepic, Ella. A black-tie affair, champagne, important people.” A whimsical sigh falls out of her. “His painting wasrevered. Daddio and Pops were bawling. Seriously, their champagne ratio was eighty-five percent tears.”

Kai sighs. “She’s exaggerating. It only caught people’s attention when they mistook it for an accidental paint spill.”

The phone shakes through my giggles. “I’m siding with Brynn on this one. I know it was epic.”

“I guess it went pretty well,” he relents, unable to stifle the proud smile that lights up his face.

“Tell me about your special day,” Brynn encourages. Kai waves me off and my best friend takes me with her as she floats around the small apartment they share in southern Florida, after making their relationship official two years ago. Blush-pink walls and girlie knickknacks whiz by while she moves into thekitchen to pour a glass of juice.

“Natine and I started the day watching the sunrise and then we rode horses for a while,” I tell her, reminiscing over the feel of the crisp wind nibbling at my cheeks. “We ate lunch in the square, browsed craft vendors, and listened to live music before getting some work in at the stables. Then Natine ordered me to get dressed up, curl my hair, put on makeup, and do absolutely nothing for the rest of the day.” I shrug, pleased with my ordinary birthday itinerary. “So I did. It was fabulous.”

“Wait, you didn’t drinkallthe cocktails? Puke in someone’s lap in true birthday-girl fashion?”

My nose scrunches up. “Hard pass.”

“For the best,” she murmurs, pausing midsip. “You’ve got that interview in the morning.”

“I told you about that?”

She chugs down the rest of her juice. “Sure. You mentioned it last week.”

“Right.” I nod, my chest fluttering at the thought of becoming a stable manager. It’ll open up so many future possibilities in this field. “It’s been great working with Natine and relearning everything about the horses,” I continue. “But I think it’s finally time to spread my wings.”

Brynn leans back against the counter. “I have a good feeling about it,” she says. “A really good feeling.”

“You do?”

“Yup. I definitely think you’ll get the job.”

“That would be amazing. And I think…” My words drift and my throat starts to burn. “I think Max would be really proud of me.”

Her eyes glaze over with tears as a few tense beats roll by. “He’s doing good, Ella. Kai talked to him last week. He asked about you.”

“Oh yeah?” The fireball in my throat catches with gasoline. “That’s nice to hear.”

“He always asks about you.”

Hot pressure burns behind my eyes.

I took Max’s pleas at face value that day in the middle of a gravelly road, rocks pressing into our kneecaps and goodbyes stabbing at our hearts. I mademy friends promise that they would never tell him where I was, never give him my new number. They all agreed. Even Mom.

They understood.

And now, even though I’m doing better and have come such a long way, I don’t know if anything has changed for us. I don’t know if hewantsto hear from me. Maybe he made me promise him those things for both of our sakes. For his own inner peace.

I’ve considered reaching out to him more times than I can count.

I’ve almost buckled under the draw of temptation.

But nearly three years have passed, and so much time has gone by. Max seems happy, settled, successful, free of my trail of tragedy that always seemed to follow us around and attach itself to us like a malignant tumor.

They say that out of sight and out of mind is the only way to truly heal and let go.

Maybe Max finally let go.

Maybe he let me go.

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