Page 170 of Catch the Sun

No.

No, no, no.

“Ella…fuck.” I jump to my feet and rake a hand through my hair, just as the RV on Chevy’s property revs to life and reverses full speed out of the yard.

I already know it’s her. I already know she’s leaving me.

My legs hardly feel attached as I stuff the check in my pocket and start to run. “Ella!”

My shoes kick up stones and rubble as the big rusted RV guns it down the neighborhood street. She sees me. She has to see me chasing after her, runningtoward her, desperate to catch her.

Chevy stands by his front door as I whip past his house. He shakes his head, tears in his eyes.

I keep running.

The RV is old, struggling as it climbs the steep hill. “Ella!” I shout cupping my hands around my mouth as the vehicle moves faster. “Ella!”

It keeps moving, the engine booming as she slams on the accelerator.

She’s leaving.

She’s leaving without a fucking goodbye.

My thighs burn and the soles of my feet ache as I run as fast as I can, catching up. Closing the gap, little by little.

I run like I’ve never run before. With Olympian speed. With the heart of a gutted, desperate man. Like it’s my life’s final marathon.

The RV keeps going and I keep running. I won’t stop. I can’t; I can’t let her go. Not like this, not after everything we’ve been through.

I’ve hardly had her. I’ve hardly had a chance to love her.

That rainy night in the clearing will not be our swan song. I refuse to let her go without a real goodbye, without holding her one more time, without one last goddamn kiss.

No, no, no.

“Ella!” I call out, my heart pounding in time with my feet, my airways narrowing as oxygen fights to fill my lungs. As I fight to reach my fucking girl before she’s lost forever. “Sunny!”

The RV zooms farther ahead, moving faster, leaving me behind.

My chest feels like it’s going to erupt, my strength draining.

I can’t catch her.

She’s too far.

She’s gone.

With a gasping howl from me, my feet finally slow to a painful stop, and I collapse to my knees in the gravel, inhaling, exhaling, every breath without her a breath with no purpose.

I stare out at the expanse of dusty, barren road as the RV becomes smaller and smaller.

I shout, I scream, I growl my agony into the sun, grief spilling from my eyes and tearing down my cheeks.

I stand upright, torn up and dying inside as I kick at a pile of rocks and fist my hair.

And then…

I freeze.

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