Page 95 of Lotus

“I’m certainly not opposed. I’ll cook steaks,” I offer. Gabe had mentioned that Travis might be stopping by at some point this weekend, so I picked up extra at the supermarket. “I’ll start preparing.”

“Dude, we can order pizza. That wasn’t a backhanded request,” he chuckles, watching as I stand from my place on the floor.

“It’s no trouble. I need the distraction.”

My gaze shifts to my bedroom window at the termdistraction. Sydney’s office is dark and unoccupied, pulling a sigh from my lips.

Gabe notices the gesture and clicks his tongue, knowingly. “Still trouble in paradise?”

“Yes, as there should be,” I reply, shame woven into every syllable. “I nearly attacked her and frightened her half to death. She’ll never trust me again.”

The excruciating silence leads me to believe that Gabe has not been informed of our most recent predicament. I thought for certain Sydney would have confided in him.

I turn to my stepbrother, who is staring at me, wordless. “You didn’t know?”

“No fucking clue what you’re talking about.”

“Oh.”

Gabe’s eyes narrow, trying to draw his own conclusions. “What do you mean you almost attacked her? You don’t have a violent bone in your body, Oliver.”

Linking my fingers behind my head, I begin pacing the room, anxiety overtaking me as I think back to the prior Saturday. I heave in a breath of regret. “I came to a very erroneous conclusion and reacted foolishly. I’ll never forgive myself.”

“What conclusion?”

My jaw tenses as my molars gnash together. “I started reading her provocative novels and thought, perhaps, she enjoyed being treated in a similar fashion.”

He blinks. “Ah.”

“Yes. I said some foul things that I can never take back.”

“Like what?”

The memory sickens me and my stomach flips. “I told her she didn’t want me sexually because she was afraid I couldn’t… fuck her properly.” My face heats, ashamed. “And then I pinned her up against a wall, like I’ve read about in quite a few of her stories and tried to kiss her.”

Gabe’s mouth hangs open as he absorbs my mortifying confession. “Well, shit. That’s sort of hot. She wasn’t into it?”

“Of course not.” I send him a deep frown, appalled by his response. “I acted like a barbarian.”

“You’re probably overreacting. I mean, a lot of women love that shit.”

“She was not at all impressed.”

Gabe pushes his tongue against the side of his cheek, attempting to put together a masterful piece of advice that will ease my mind, I’m sure. “I guess there’s always Tabitha.”

He fails quite miserably.

My glare sinks into him as I release a groan. “Tabitha and I enjoyed our date, but we’re better suited as friends. I can’t pursue another female when my loyalty is with Sydney.”

“Dude, there’s no loyalty,” Gabe insists, moving towards me. “You’re not in a relationship. You can both fuck whoever you want.”

“I don’t want to be intimate with anyone else.”

“Whatever, man,” Gabe sighs, walking backwards, throwing his hands up. He’s about to leave the room when he pauses in the entryway. “So, this is totally tacky, but… since you’re not interested in Tabitha, can I be?”

“What?”

He wiggles his eyebrows at me, a sly grin in place. “She’s a solid ten. I will send her a friend requestright nowif you give me permission. I’m a dick, I’m sorry, but that girl is incredible.”

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