Page 122 of Breaker

Desire is a sin.That’s what the nuns used to tell me. It’s deadly And I wanted,desired,my name so bad I did the worst thing a person could do. The only sin worse than lust is wrath. And I let it take over my body, my mind. Let wrath feed the bad things inside me and now my brothers and I are going to die as payment for what I’ve done.

“It’s okay,” Viper’s saying, and I think he’s been saying it over and over, because he’s cupping my cheeks now, looking down at me with so much fear in those blue eyes that my knees give.

“Who was he?” I hear Striker ask, but his words sound far away.

Viper’s forehead presses to mine. “Breath, Breaker. Breathe,” he says. “Keep your shit together and breathe.”

I open my mouth to tell him I’m sorry. That this is all my fault. That I’m sorry he never had a Nanny like I did. I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough to defy Fallon that day on the rooftop. How greedy I’ve been, wanting Father’s love again, when Viper’s never even had it at all. Not like I do. And now he never will because of the things I’ve done, but a strangled sob creaks out of my throat instead.

He presses his lips to my forehead, cupping the back of my neck., trying to keep me focused.

“We have to keep going,” Viper says, pulling me forward. He grabs Striker’s shirt and yanks him, drawing him close withan arm over his shoulder as he moves us along. “Striker, don’t look back. Let’s just keep going.”

“Who did that?” Striker asks, daring a glance over his shoulder.

He’s braver than me. I don’t want to see it again. I already see too much when I close my eyes at night.

All that blood.

“They fucking gutted—”

“Enough,” Viper barks out, catching my misstep. “We need to get to that truck.”

“Is someone going to do that to us?” I hear myself asking. “Is that how we’re going to die?”

“No,” Viper says, but I hear how his voice quakes. He’s scared too.

Striker stops walking, pointing behind us. “Someone did that. On purpose. They are out here right now.”

“Stop.”

“Someone pinned that man to a tree and peeled his fle—”

Stop!”

“Who the fuck did that Viper?” Striker yells. “Who did that to that man?”

“I don’t know,” Viper says, but I can barely hear him. “All I know is we need to get the fuck out of here, and fast.”

Viper cups my cheeks again and I realize I’m crying, sucking in air, my lungs burning, my legs shaking, my mind flashing on what’s behind us.

It’s all I can see.

Face nothing but red ooze. Arms sawed off. Flesh gone. Rope digging into the still wet tissue, keeping him tied to the tree.

Guts spilling out, covered in black flies.

I turn and heave, but nothing comes up.

“Come on,” Viper says, pulling me up and dragging me along. “Get moving, Breaker, or I swear to God, I’ll leave your ass and—”

“I’ll have to hike back alone,” I say for him.

Chapter 37

Breaker

The school ironed outany unease normal men have when they are under stress. We were trained brutally in a harsh environment, the constant threat of Fallon’s punishments looming over us. Living under constant strain and the threat of Fallon’s wrath became our normal. We lived and breathed; we grew and slept; we ate and fought in a place that wanted to hurt us.

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