Page 51 of When Stars Fall

“I hold a grudge like you would not believe.”

“That why it took you ten years to get here?” She gives me a sideways glance.

“Maybe. Who knows? Sometimes I have no idea why it took me so long. I did try a few times. I kept waiting for Ellie to cave. There was also that small drug habit I had going on. Kept me pretty distracted from reality for a long time. Between back-to-back movie roles and feeding my addictions, I didn’t let myself dwell on why I felt so shitty.”

“Why are you here now?”

“My sister.” I purse my lips. “We’ve been doing counseling, trying to get to the bottom of our mutual issues. Ellie kept coming up over and over in sessions. How much I loved her, how sad I was that I fucked it up. Anna asked me at what point I was going to go after what I wanted. Funny coming from her, but something clicked. I started making phone calls, trying to connect with Ellie, get someone to talk to me.” I trace patterns in the sand.

“I remember I had a message about a year ago from your personal assistant. Ignored it.”

“You and a bunch of others. Some things don’t change. No one wanted me back in Ellie’s life.”

“Someone finally talked?” Calshae stretches out her legs in the sand.

“You don’t get all my secrets, Calshae.” I lie back on the blanket. “I think I should go to the school. They’ll like seeing me, right? Who doesn’t want to hang out with Wyatt Burgess?” I cock an eyebrow, and she grins a little. “Ellie’s doing some kind of drama thing?”

“You’re not going to the school.”

“I’m going to do something stupid if I sit around all day.” I throw an arm across my face to block out the sun.

“Going to the school would be stupid.”

“I get that.” Sort of. I’m sure the students would like to see me. Even Ellie wouldn’t be mad for that long once I turned on the charm.

Seeing Ellie has fanned the flickering flame, creating an inferno that is threatening to consume me. I can’t get her out of my head. Leaving her behind when I have to return to LA is going to gut me. If she won’t give me another chance, I’m worried about my ability to cope.

“What do you normally do when you feel like this?” Calshae asks. “You can’t always be playing with your nephew.”

“When I’m on location or on set, I run a lot or work out. But I’ve done both of those this morning.”

“Swim?”

“I’m a terrible swimmer.”

“Want me to teach you?”

Removing my arm from across my face, I glance at her. “I’m not always the most patient person when I can’t catch onto something.”

“I remember you on a golf course. Then again, I think you’d been drinking that morning. Consider me warned.” Calshae gestures for me to get organized. “Come on. You want to do something? I can teach you to swim. What are you doing with Ellie after Haven’s done school?”

“How’d you know we were doing something with Haven too?”

Calshae stands and brushes off her legs. She takes her time before saying, “They spend a lot of time together.”

“Haven wants me to kayak and snorkel with her tonight.” I rise and flick the sand off my shorts. Once we’re both off the blanket, I refold it into a neat square. “I would prefer it if she didn’t have to save me from drowning.”

“She’s a great little swimmer. She’s always making the local paper for her swimming competitions.”

“Really?” There’s a twinge of unexpected pride.

“You’ve been totally clean for two years?” She searches my face.

“Since I was never a boy scout, I’ll swear on the Daisy Network’s honor. I’ll let you decide what that means.” I put my hand on my chest. My drug habit started even before I was on my Daisy show. Ellie is one of the few people who realizes that. There wasn’t much I kept from her.

She shakes her head and turns to walk up the path. “Come on. We’ll start in the pool before we tackle the big, bad ocean,” she says over her shoulder.

I stare after her. Sometimes, she says or does something that reminds me of Ellie. They used to be such great friends. Strange they’ve grown so far apart.

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