Page 6 of Conveniently Yours

Six hours later, I'm home, sitting on the sofa with Tilly on my knees. My gaze on the white stick has two pink lines.

Fuck. I'm so screwed.

THREE

AXEL

"Have you spoken to her?" Noah asks, the guilt in his voice is heavy.

I look at the man I’ve considered a brother for over ten years, a man that has been with me every step of the way as I've had to deal with my father's infidelity and what it has done to my mother. I have stood by Noah as he lost his parents and helped him when he needed me the most. Never have I seen his look as defeated as he does now. The black eye he has doesn't help with that.

"No," I say, my voice harder than intended, but I can't push my anger aside any more.

Five weeks ago, I finally managed to be with the woman that I have wanted, and I had thought it was going to be good. Scarlett and I were happy for a few hours, until a drunken asshole came along. Noah was beyond angry, and I knew walking away was the best answer. I regret not speaking with Scarlett, I shouldn't have walked away. I know that now, I know all the ways I fucked up that morning, but none more so than letting Scarlett think that I didn't want her.

I left knowing it was the best way for Noah to calm the fuck down. He's struggling, he knew Scarlett was leaving for college, and it was getting to him, he thought he was losing everyone. We'd spoken at length about it, his anxiety and fear pushed me to do what I had wanted to do since Scarlett turned eighteen. I knew Noah wouldn't approve, but never did I think he'd react the way he did.

He releases a heavy sigh, running a hand through his dark greasy hair. It doesn't look as though he's washed in weeks. "I fucked up, Ax, what do you want me to do?"

"Not call your sister a fucking whore," I snarl. "Not tell her that you wished she was dead. Fuck, Noah, anything would have been better than what you actually done. I'm not surprised she left."

I just wish there was a way I could find her and let her know I fucked up, plead with her for a second chance. But I know she’s going to be hurt, and she was betrayed by both me and Noah in less than an hour. I fucking hate that I've hurt her. I wish I could make it better, but I can't. She's gone.

"You think I don't know that?" he snaps, getting to his feet. "I fucked up, I let my fear of losing her push her away. I've called her every day, I call her and text, but I don't get a reply. She hates me, and I don't blame her."

I grit my teeth as I look at my best friend, my brother, he's close to the edge. When his parents died, he felt guilty, he felt as though it was his fault. He was supposed to go with them to the party they were attending, but he didn't. Instead, he was with me, partying. When he found out about the crash, he crumpled to the floor and cried. It took a lot of time for him to stop feeling the guilt, I spent every night for three months sleeping on the sofa because he had hit rock bottom, and I wasn’t sure if he’d do something that would take him from this world. Having Scarlettbe dependent on him seemed to help him, but with that, he turned to drinking and partying.

"You need to get your act together," I tell him. Knowing that he's not been sleeping or eating, the beer bottles are not only scattered across the table, but also on the floor. The house is a fucking mess, and he needs to pull his shit together. "If you don't, Noah, you're going to end up hating yourself even more and then what'll happen? You'll hit rock bottom."

He nods. "How can I when I've hurt her?"

I sigh as I get to my feet, watching where I step so I don't break any bottles. "We both hurt her, Noah. I fucking care about her," I tell him. Hell, it's more than that. Scarlett is the only woman that's ever made me want more. The night I spent with her was more than I could have ever imagined. "I fucked up by letting your anger and bullshit ruin something that I wanted."

His eyes flash with anger. "She's my fucking sister," he snarls. "You shouldn't have touched her."

"Asshole," I hiss. "It was none of your business what I do or what Scarlett does. Instead of talking with the two of us, you blew up and hurt her. I fucked up by choosing you over her." It's something I've regretted daily, but I know Noah, I know what he can handle, and I needed to speak to him when he was in a better mood, when he'd calmed the fuck down.

"Hence the black eye," he says, his lips twisting into a smirk. "Still can't punch for shit."

"You're lucky that's all you got," I tell him. "Knowing how much you messed up saved you from a real fucking beating."

Walking into the house after Scarlett drove off, I found him crying on the bottom step. I knew then that he'd been a fucking asshole to her, but when I found out what he had said, I was so fucking angry. He's lucky a black eye is all he ended up with.

"I know. So, what do we do?" he asks.

I shake my head. "I've no fucking idea," I tell him honestly. "But you need to get yourself together. Find a fucking job that pays well and get your life in order."

He nods. "Hopefully she'll return."

I can only fucking hope.

"Son,"Dad greets me as I reach the table.

I've been summoned for dinner, not only is my father here, but my mother too. They always love to keep up pretenses. No one outside of the home knows they’re fucking miserable, and my father is the biggest asshole known to man. I guess what I did to Scarlett shows I'm more like my father than I thought.

"Father," I respond as I take a seat. "Mother."

My mother gives me a soft smile. She's been beaten down by my father's actions and words, she's a damn shell of the woman she once was. If there was something I could do to get her out from under his thumb, I'd do it. But as a woman who has no education and married my father when she was a teen, she's relied on him for a long time. She's never worked, and she wouldn't know how to survive without him.

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