Page 75 of Shifting Gears

She tells Dani about her father, about his distance and his cold anger. How she worked her entire life to earn his praise and never succeeded. She tells Dani about her never-ending line of stepmothers, each with their own ideas about who Eleanor Cromwell should be, and the inconsistency it gave her childhood.

Dani absorbs it all. She catches Nora like a safety net as she spirals through her years of isolation and loneliness, and how she turned to knowledge as a comfort. Achievement and constant work. How it all instilled in her a bone-deep sense ofnot good enough, one that she can’t escape no matter how many all-nighters she pulls doing a job she never wanted.

She even tells Dani what she’s never quite admitted to herself—that no matter how much she treasures Kayla and Ash, she’s never been able to open up to them the way they have to her. She doesn’t understand why they care about her, and she often pushes them away just so they can’t hurt her first.

It’s all easier to say when they aren’t lying face to face. By the end of it, Nora is crying, but she feels lighter than she has in years. The weight of an adolescence she’s always refused to share has been lifted from her shoulders, and Dani isn’t judging or trying to fix anything. She’s just listening.

Dani holds her, spooning herself against Nora’s back in a tight and soothing position. She lets Nora calm down incomfortable quiet so she can sort out her feelings in isolation the way she’s used to without needing to actually be alone.

Dani’s perfect. She’s so much more than Nora deserves.

After a long silence, caught up in the tangled, messy web of truth telling, Nora stumbles out of the past and into the present.

“Dani, I haven’t been totally honest with you.” Nora’s in unknown territory, driving through a blizzard with zero visibility and just hoping the road is still beneath the tires. “There’s something I need to tell you. I’ve needed to tell you for a long time. Even if you hate me for it, I need you to know.”

Dani makes a quiet noise behind her, her face still pressed between Nora’s shoulders.

Nora steadies herself and steps off the cliff. “This summer is more than a vacation. I was here on a work trip, for my company. For…CromTech. I’m the CEO of CromTech.”

Dani says nothing.

“I know I should have told you. It started as me not wanting to mess up my project, but then it snowballed the more we got close and—and by the time things progressed, I didn’t want to lose you by telling you the whole truth,” Nora says. The hand that isn’t clinging to Dani’s arm is clenched into itself in a tight fist. Her voice is weak, but she pushes on. “CromTech’s investors have been on me about financing all my sustainable-tech pitches. So I presented the county as an easy development venture to fund our research.”

Still Dani says nothing. Nora can’t bring herself to turn over to look at her, to see the disappointment she’s sure is etched into Dani’s face.

“My original proposal was to buy up as much property as we could and push for tourism to spike value. Make it a resort town and then sell it all. But I changed my mind, I—I can’t do that now. I’ve been thinking of other solutions.”

Nora’s breath is coming so quickly that she’s sure she must be close to hyperventilation. She focuses on her breaths, letting the finality of her confession wash over her as Dani’s silence stretches on.

“I didn’t expect it to be like this. I didn’t want to get close to anyone, I just wanted to…” Nora’s voice falters. There’s a hollow ache in her chest as it all spills out of her. Her breath hitches on a fresh wave of tears. “I was just looking for the best way to profit. I’m sorry.”

Nora waits for the hammer to fall. She waits for Dani to do something—to speak, to get angry, to get up and leave. For the unearned bubble of half-truths Nora has been living in to finally pop. But Dani is unmoving.

In the quiet of the dark bedroom, Nora hears a soft snore.

Like a balloon popping under a descending foot, all the energy goes out of Nora at once. It’s partly disappointment, knowing that she’s going to have to muster up the courage to tell Dani the truth at some other time, but there’s also no small amount of relief—the idea of Dani hating her is terrifying, even in its inevitability. Nora has barely two weeks left here, and now that she’s truly facing down the reality of not having Dani in her life anymore, it feels worse than she ever imagined.

She doesn’t know if she has the strength to do this again.

As Dani pulls her closer with a sleepy grunt, enveloping her in a sense of safety even now, a thought comes to Nora. One that’s as terrifying as it is exhilarating. It drifts across her mind like a rubber duck bobbing on the river, gentle but undeniable.

I think I’m in love with you.

Chapter 17

Once Nora has thought them,the words take root in her brain and don’t let go.

I think I’m in love with you.

This new knowledge stays with her for every moment of her dwindling time with Dani, even when they’re apart. It leeches into her sleep. Most nights, she dreams of Dani, even when the subject of her dreaming is right next to her in bed. She then wakes up with an ache in her chest because she dreamt of impossible futures.

It sits in the back of Nora’s mind as she finally finds a moment to look over her survey report for the first time in almost two months. The text reads like it was written by another person—succinct and emotionless. Reading it now, the prospect of any of it coming to fruition is horrifying. All the things Nora had suggested so easily when she arrived now feel like the worst possible outcomes, and in the few days after her botched confession, she throws herself into new ideas while Dani is at work.

It’s not an easy prospect. The ideal, shoot-for-the-stars solution is deceptively simple—it’s what Nora has wanted all along, really.

Two of the old CromTech warehouses are still usable. Refurbishing them to produce and test the experimental tech on Nora’s docket would bring jobs to the area in a more productive way. It could be a mutually beneficial arrangement if the people of Riverwalk can be convinced to trust a company that’s already screwed them over.

It won’t, however, make CromTech the kind of money the shareholders want. She could emphasize the cost savings of not needing to lease manufacturing space, but investing in an eco-tech division in the first place is a big ask when Nora is no longer recommending a development project to fund it. It isn’t the easy money-maker that Riverwalk was supposed to be.

---