Page 26 of Chasing Sparks

“Isn’t it? Haven’t the last ten years been all about Lucille? She was a heartless bitch, and you’re lucky you didn’t get caught in her web.”

One thing about Braden—he knows how to hold a grudge against my ex.

He also had Lucille pegged from the start, but even after what she did, he never threw it in my face. Never once did he say, ‘I told you so,’ or remind me how he warned me.

Not that I don’t blame myself daily for not realizing the truth sooner. I still do, and nothing can change my mind.

I won’t allow it.

Emotional distance keeps me safe, and that’s the way I like it.

Now, if only I could convince Braden of that.

“You’re right. I’m damn lucky to have slipped Lucille’s clutches and I willneverwind up in that position again. I’ll be in my office if you need me.”

I make it four steps before he throws out a comeback.

“There’s something to be said about a serious relationship with the right woman.”

With a choked laugh, I pivot on my heel. “Says the man who’s not in one.”

“If I met the right woman, I would absolutely consider it.You’vemet the right woman.”

“I meet lots of women.”

“And you’ve fucked even more, but are you happy? What Lucille did to you was beyond messed up, but when are you going to stop blaming every woman out there for her indiscretions? When are you going to stop blaming yourself?”

“Dude, if I wanted a therapy session, I’d still be screwing my shrink.” A callous comment, no doubt, but I need Braden off my back about this love stuff.

My brother doesn’t get it. His heart has never been decimated.

Mine has, and I’ll be damned if it happens again.

Besides, I’ve been completely up front with Ori about my lifestyle. She knows exactly where I stand on relationships.

I’m honest witheverywoman—no confusion, no false expectations. That way, no hearts get entangled, and no blame gets thrown my way when I have the audacity to stay true to my word.

I keep it simple and straightforward. Any woman who doesn’t like it knows where the door is, and I wish her the best in finding a man who can fill that role.

I really do.

Because I’mnotthat guy.

Braden can tell from the set of my jaw that I’m done with this conversation, but although he might walk away now, I haven’t heard the last on the subject. When he latches onto an idea—no matter how ridiculous—he’s like a dog with a juicy bone. Fucking relentless.

“You’re an idiot,” he mutters, tossing his coffee cup into the garbage.

“Why? Because I’m telling the truth?”

“You’re so mired in past grievances you don’t know what the truth is.”

That’s where he’s wrong. I know exactly what the truth is. And it fucking terrifies me.

Will I admit that? Not a chance. Even admitting it to myself takes serious effort.

But Braden sees the difference between Ori and all the other women who have drifted in and out of my life.

I see it, too, and that’s exactly why Imustkeep my wits about me.

---