Page 145 of Chasing Sparks

At least I’m not moping around like a lovesick cow anymore.

Now I’m a raging fucking bull, and if you see me coming, get the hell out of my way.

I knew something was up with Eddie. I knew it, and I called Ori out on it, and the woman denied it time and again.

She claimed there was nothing between them. Eddie wasn’t overly attentive or caring. He was just a contractor, hired to restore her house.

Sure. More like they’re playing house.

Hell, she didn’t even try to hide her affection for the asshole—hugging him as he strutted from her apartment after doing God knows what to my woman.

The way she embraced him like he was her lifeline—or her lover. It didn’t matter. It was enough to light me up.

Wait. She’s not my woman. Not anymore.

Must keep reminding myself of that fact, as if the sting ever dulls.

Does Oriana Thorne really think I can’t find somewhere else to hang my hat and get my rocks off?

Have we met?

I have a black book that’s thicker than a phone book, for Christ’s sake.

A long list of women who want to fuck me, and trust me, I’m all about the hate fucking right now.

Casey fromInk Spotcalled yesterday, claiming she had some business to discuss about the tattoo tour, but I saw it for what it really was. A business facade for a night of pleasure.

I damn near caved.

Why the hell not, right?

I even accepted her offer … and then canceled an hour before arriving at her suite.

Why?

Because of Oriana fucking Thorne, that’s why.

The woman has destroyed me for other women.

Destroyed me, period.

How stupid can one man be? Honestly? I thought Ori’s teary expression and hesitancy to disclose her innermost thoughts had something to do with us.

I guess in a way it did.

She had ended any chance of our reconciliation without bothering to let me in on the knowledge. Then she had the audacity to flaunt her new man in front of me.

I hate her for wrecking me like this. It’s easier than admitting I still want her.

That I’ll probably always want her.

Like I said. I’m done with love.

The only upside? I’ve thrown myself into work and cranked out two weeks’ worth of labor onRum & Ruinin three nights.

That’s what love will do for you. Break your heart and make you break a damn sweat, right after you’re done breaking a few walls.

Three new pieces of sheetrock are hanging as we speak, replacing the ones that met an untimely demise courtesy of my fists. At least I didn’t hit a beam. Small mercies, right?

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