Page 122 of Chasing Sparks

I wave my hands, warding off that conversation. “No, no, no. I need to go?—”

But Ash blocks my exit. “Can you not run away from me right now? I know you’re scared and confused. Well, so am I. But, Ori, you’ve been my port in the storm since day one, and I really need that safety now.”

But what aboutmysafety?

“I don’t sleep. I’m barely eating,” Ash continues, his face lined with worry. “I thought if I could see you, life might make sense again.”

I swallow, trying to contain the swell of emotions threatening to break free. Time to be his friend. “I’m here. Might as well have a drink. Just water, though.”

Ash pours a glass and slides it over, our fingers brushing, that ever-present spark lighting up the cells in my body.

Hopefully, one day, that spark will extinguish.

“I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you,” I whisper. “It’s just … hard.”

“Trust me, I know.”

But he doesn’t. He has a future, even if he isn’t too keen on it at the moment. I have sleepless nights and an empty bed.

I glance at the wall behind the bar, desperate to change the subject. “Remember that mirror you found at the Dean Estate?”

He narrows his eyes at my random segue. “The gilded one? Yeah, why?”

“You should hang it here. I’ll have Eddie bring it to you.”

Ash frowns. “You sure you don’t want to keep it?”

“No. The more time goes on, the less I like that place.”

Ash slides his glass in slow circles on the bar. “I thought you might say that, so I have an idea.”

“Let’s hear it.”

“We get married, and I take over the restoration. You won’t have to worry about it anymore.”

My mouth drops open, my jaw slack at his offhanded marriage proposal.

I step onto the bar footrest, leaning forward to glance behind the counter. “Did you hit your head back there?”

“No.”

I motion between us. “You just suggested marriage. Don’t worry, I know it’s the whiskey talking, but you’d better slow down before you propose to the whole town.”

“I’m not drunk.” His jaw tightens as he looks away. “I’m just … trying to tell you how I feel.”

“You don’t want me to sell the Dean Estate. Got it.”

“No.” He hits the bar with the side of his fist, the glass wobbling on the wood. “That’s not it. Fuck, Ori.”

I push away from the bar. “Maybe I should go. This wasn’t a good idea.”

In a flash, Ash rounds the bar, caging me between it and his arms. His eyes burn with desperation—a turbulent sea of emotions.

“You always begged me to open up, and now that I am, you’re shutting me down?”

I jerk my head away and focus on the floor. “I’d rather not talk about something I’ll never have.”

But Ash will not let me hide. He grasps my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze, our mouths mere inches apart. “Name it and I’ll make it happen.”

---