Page 28 of S.O.S. Billboard

One by one, starting at Del’s left, each team-member gave their current sit-rep.

“I’m finished with the missing husband case,” Prez supplied, looking relieved.

Everyone groaned, commiserating with Prez. They all hated those slimy, spouse-gone-rogue jobs.

“He was shacked up with his secretary in a motel north of Boston. When I confronted him, he promised he’d be in touch with his wife to sort things out, whatever that means.” He gave a snort. “The wife was happy to know he wasn’t dead, but once she found out he was cheating on her, she wished him to hell in so many creative ways, I wish I’d written them all down.”

The entire group laughed.

Dell nodded, and pointed to Sarge. “What about your job?”

“It wasn’t easy,” Sarge admitted, running a hand back through his short dark hair.

Billboard knew he’d been hired by the family of a woman with Alzheimer’s who’d recently passed, tasked to find a cache of jewelry that the woman had unwittingly squirreled away in her home before her demise.

“Her son and daughter had already ripped the place apart, and were sure the things were gone; that she’d given the items to some scammer. But my, uh, attention to detail wouldn’t let me give up.”

By that, Billboard knew Sarge meant that his OCD hadn’t allowed him to call it quits until every square inch of the woman’s house had been examined.

“I eventually found the stuff in a plastic bag in the tank of her basement toilet.” He grimaced. “Not the cleanest spot in the home, but I persevered and gamely fished it out. The family was extremely thankful, as apparently there are a lot of history and memories tied up with that jewelry.”

“Nice job, Sarge,” Del smiled, then winked. “I’ll add a little hazard-pay to your next check for your troubles.”

He went on to Perk, next. “What about you, Perkins?” he asked. “Is the swing-set back in place?”

Billboard smothered a laugh. Dealing with missing people and items was always a challenge, but this particular job had made them all scratch their heads. In a suburb north of Boston, a resident’s large piece of playground equipment had disappeared from their yard in the middle of the night. The family was at a loss; saying they didn’t have any enemies. But what they also didn’t have was a ring camera, which meant Perk tracking down the purloined structure wasn’t going to be easy.

“It took a long and very frustrating week of watching and waiting, but our perp finally came out of hiding when he went afteranotherneighbor’s jungle gym. I nabbed him red-handed. I was going to turn him over to the local PD, but…”

Funny. Perk hesitated, looking a bit sheepish.

“Don’t tell me,” Maygan guessed. “It was an old, disgruntled neighbor who didn’t like all the happy noises the kids were making, and you felt his pain and let him off with a slap on the wrist.”

Maygan was a soccer coach, and actuallylovedthe screams and squeals that went along with her job.

“Nope,” Perk grinned. “It was actually a troubled teen who was jealous because his family never had the money to buy him any of that type of apparatus when he was young.”

Damn.That was just…sad.

“So, what did you do if you didn’t turn him in?” Mizzay asked.

“I made a deal with him and his parents. Who were mortified by the way. They all agreed to my terms,” Perk said. “First, the kid has to reassemble what he stole. Then, he has to find a therapist to help him with his anger issues,afterwhich he’ll be going to camp.”

“Camp?” O’Shea questioned with surprise in her voice.

“Yup. Up north. Near Bangor, where I’m from. There’s a camp for kids who are bullied, and/or have self-esteem issues. The woman who runs it, Hilly Duncan-Andera, has agreed to take the young man on, once he’s been vetted by the shrink and been cleared that he poses no threat.”

It was a nice ending to a story that could have landed the kid in juvie.

“Great job, Perk,” Del nodded. “Who else? Wiley?”

“I’m still in the middle of things, boss-man,” he revealed, sighing. “And I’ll tell you, I feel more like a carny-barker than an investigator. When the wife in the household got mad that her husband wasn’t paying her enough attention, she started putting the guy’s stuff up for bid on the internet, and it was like ‘come one, come all’. Compiling a list of everything he’s missing, then tracking all that stuff down has been a challenge. It’s everywhere. Did you know there’s an actual country called Kiribati?”

Sarge didn’t even hesitate. “An island country in the Micronesia subregion of Oceania, in the central Pacific Ocean,” he rattled off.

“What the hell, Sarge?” Wiley gaped.

Sarge shrugged. “Well, that’s what Wikipedia says,” he revealed with a slight blush.

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