Page 29 of Disorderly

“In this case, his only thoughts were of you.” I pushed away from him, but not enough to dislodge his arm while turning my head to face him.

“How do you figure that?” Of all the things I could have imagined he’d say, that wouldn’t have even made the list. How did thinking of me lead to kissing someone else? And not just anyone else, but someone who would lead you tooutingyourself in front of your co-workers, students, and other townspeople.

“I know it sounds crazy but it’s true. He’s been watching how Krissy and others have been pestering you again, wanting to get close to you to get close to him. And after what happened this summer, he didn’t want you to have to put up with it. Add in that Krissy has been harassing him at school, doing things like leaving her panties in his desk drawer…” I gasped, not having heard that little tidbit before. In the bathroom, I’d heard girls talk about doing something like that before, but never thought any of them had the guts to follow through. To think that Krissy did, made me angry… and disgusted on his behalf.

He pulled me back to his side. The corners of my mouth lifted into a soft smile, knowing that he wanted me in his arms. It made me feel cherished, like he truly cared—maybe even loved me. “So when he saw her, heard her with you at the field, he made a rash decision to do something that would let her know he wasn’t single anymore. He figured if he wasn’t single then she wouldn’t harass you and him anymore. But he didn’t want to grab a random person and kiss them. Not in front of you though. That he wouldn’t do.”

I scoffed. Seeing Peter kiss some random woman wasn’t something new. I’d seen him do a whole lot more with them even if he didn’t always know that I saw. This was something that Jason knew which was probably why he squeezed me tighter into his embrace.

“Not now. Not anymore. I know he’s done that in the past, but he’s wanting to change. No more hook ups with random strangers.” I nodded, not necessarily agreeing with him, but acknowledging what he said.

“So Jarrod was it. The right person at the right time. Neither one meant to hurt you. I didn’t mean to either.” I felt his lips press against my hair. “Can you forgive us, forgive me for what happened?”

He waited patiently, holding me while I thought it over. I really wanted to forgive them. What Jason said, how he explained it, made me realize that it was all a big mix-up. None of it had been done intentionally to hurt people. Well, maybe to hurt Krissy and the other senior girls who had been making my life miserable. But even then, the intention really wasn’t to hurt them but to make their actions stop. And it had. At least it had stopped Krissy for the moment. Next week and the week after would truly be the test, but somehow, I doubted that the girls would bother me again. So even though I felt some lingering hurt and betrayal, I could forgive them. Peter had acted out of a place of compassion and caring. I couldn’t hold that against him.

My thoughts continued to run their course, switching to Jason and culpability. He hadn’t told me that he was with Peter and Jarrod. But then again, I’d never asked. I’d never questioned how close they were. Besides, he hadn’t withheld the information to hurt me. In fact, he’d told me what he could without revealing their secrets. Secrets he wasn’t given permission to share. I understood that. I knew secrets about people that I didn’t share with others because it wasn’t up to me to tell them.

Having my concerns settled enough, I tilted my head back. “I forgive you. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry that I was the one who told you, causing you to hurt.”

He grinned at me. The light and sparkle back in his eyes. “Well, if it’s my forgiveness you want, I’ll give it to you. Now can we kiss and make up?”

I chuckled and nodded, but the sound was cut off as he pressed his mouth to mine. People had talked about how make up sex was the best—well it and angry sex depending on the source—but I’d never believed it. Now I did. Because if this kiss was anything to go by, make up sex had to be phenomenal.

When he pulled back, he left me breathless and dizzy, throbbing with a need for something more. “Why don’t you get dressed? I’ll wait downstairs and then we can go grab some fresh cinnamon buns for breakfast with the guys.”

After agreeing with him, he pressed a kiss to the tip of my nose before walking out of the room. I grinned even wider when I noticed that he had to adjust himself in his pants. I’d done that to him. I’d made him hard. It was a powerful feeling that lasted through my shower and until I was partially dressed. I’d pulled on a pink and grey camo long-sleeved shirt that I knew Peter would like when I realized, I knew about them being together, but did they know about Jason and I? Were Jason and I doing the same thing to them that they’d done to us? And was Jason cheating on them by being with me?

I flopped onto my bed and covered my face. Fan-crapping-tastic! I was no better than them.

Chapter Twenty

Katy

“Jason, can I ask you a question?”

He looked up from the sink where he was washing mom’s dishes from last night and this morning. He held the clean plate under the running water, rinsing off the soap before he placed it on the drying rack. “You can always ask me anything.”

I played with the ends of my sleeves. Was I being stupid? Jason wouldn’t have kissed me if it was the same thing, right? Or maybe he hadn’t thought everything through either. While he wasn’t as bad as Peter, Jason had a reputation when he was younger for speaking with his fists first and then thinking. Kisses were different than fists, but the concept was the same. At least it was to me.

“Spit it out, Baby Girl. I’m not going to bite.” He dried his hands on a towel as he stalked towards me, crowding me against the wall. He tilted his head, pressing it into the crook of my neck. “That is unless you ask me too.” He nipped my neck causing me to squeal.

“Fine. Fine,” I said while pushing against his chest until he lifted his head enough to rest his forehead against mine. “Do they know about you and me? Are we doing the same to them? And are you cheating on them by kissing me?” Once I opened my mouth, every concern and question spilled out in one breath.

“Oh, Baby Girl.” He pulled me against his hard chest, wrapping his arms around me in a massive bear hug. And when he spoke, I felt his words rumble against my cheek. “Don’t you worry about that. We’re not cheating. Not. At. All. I had planned on telling them that I was seeing someone, a female, who knew I was also seeing them.” He pulled on the ends of my braid, tilting my head back. “Are you okay with that? With me not telling them that it’s you?”

I bit my lower lip. Did I mind? I wasn’t sure. On one hand I didn’t want to hide things. I loved them all and secrets didn’t seem like love. Yet at the same time, until I knew that they all returned my feelings, I didn’t want to put another roadblock in the path. There were too many of them there already.

“It’s not because I don’t want them to know,” he continued when I didn’t speak. “I do.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I have this dream of the future. One that contains you and them. And I don’t want to jeopardize it. I’ve spoken parts of it to you and parts to them. I just…”

When his voice trailed off, I made my decision. I’d always trusted him. It’s why—even though I asked him to leave when I woke—I didn’t push him. I hadn’t really wanted him to leave. And even though I was hurt and betrayed—which should have destroyed my trust—I still trusted him under all those other feelings. And he needed to know that. “I trust you, Jason.”

“Thanks, Little Love. It means so much to me that you still trust me like that after yesterday.” He released my hair, letting my head fall back to his chest. I stood that way for a few minutes, absorbing the closeness and safety I felt in his arms, before stepping back. As much as I wanted to stay here with him, I knew I needed to see Peter and Jarrod. I hadn’t been overly joyful or happy yesterday about their relationship and they deserved better from me. Yet I worried about seeing them. Jason may have told me that he was with them, in whatever type of relationship they had between them, but I hadn’t seen them together like that. It made it not seem quite as real. But their kiss was burned into my mind. And I worried how I’d react seeing them together.

Jason smiled at me as if he knew the struggle within me. “Let’s go get those buns. Things will be better for everyone once we’re all together.”

“Yay.” I raised my eyebrows at him. He laughed. And this time it was the full throaty one that I loved. The one that brought a true smile to my face.

“You’ve trusted me this far so don’t stop now.” He spun me around and pushed me towards the front door. As we walked, he leaned down and spoke into my ear, “Don’t worry, Baby Girl. You’ve got them wrapped around your pinkie. They’re going to do everything they can to show you how sorry they are.”

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