Page 12 of Falling for the Forward

“Be back here in fifteen,” Coach says, capping the black marker he was writing on the whiteboard with.

The other guys head out of the meeting room to grab drinks or use the bathroom. I approach Coach Turner.

“Hey, Coach, I need to return a call from my attorney about the girls. She said it’s important. I don’t know if I’ll even catch her when I call, but I wanted to let you know in case I’m not back in time.”

“No problem. Do what you need to do.”

He’s an intense coach, but he’s always telling us family comes first. When Rachel died, he told me to take as much time as I needed. I knew he meant it, too. But every time I saw that we’d lost when I was in San Diego, I felt guilty about being gone.

That’s a thing we all experience in hockey--our team becomes family, too, and we want to be there for our families and our team families at the same time sometimes. In the wake of my sister’s unexpected death, all I wanted to do was hit opponents. I fought my way through my first two games back.

Nothing feels worse than helplessness. Seeing Olivia, Charlotte and Hallie devastated over losing their mom was so much harder for me than grieving Rachel was. Aunt Rosie told me to hug them and just let them cry, to stop trying to keep them from being so sad.

It’s damn hard, though. My nature is to hold things up as they’re breaking. To keep them from falling and shattering. But the girls had already cracked into a thousand pieces. I still feel like I’m picking them up, which I’m not great at.

I take my phone into an empty training room, flip the light switch on, and push a button on my screen to call Michelle back.

“Hey, Carter,” she says, answering her cell immediately. “Thanks for getting right back to me, I know how busy you are.”

“No problem, what’s up?”

“The response from Chad Sanderson’s attorney was filed.” I can hear the grimace in her tone. “I don’t like the looks of it. He’s living in Seward, Alaska, and he’s been employed at the same place for more than two years. He’s engaged to a woman and they’re expecting a child. And he wants full custody.”

I shift, tensing as I pace across the room. “He hasn’t tried to see them in five years, though. And Rachel made me their guardian.”

“He’s their biological parent, though.”

“Technically, but he’s a piss-poor excuse for a father. Excuse my language.”

“Don’t worry about it. He’s a deadbeat, to put it mildly. I reached out to his attorney--”

“So the guy who can’t afford child support can afford an attorney?” I shake my head and look at the ceiling. “I paid you twenty grand. Is that what he’s paying?”

“I don’t know, but...I get it. And you won’t be surprised that his attorney inquired about whether Rachel had life insurance.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I roar, not caring who can hear me. “He wants to make money when my sister’s cold in the ground?”

“The attorney said he wants to know if there would be life insurance to provide for the children.”

I’m so pissed I think my head might actually blow off my shoulders. “Yeah, like hell it would go to the girls. I’m not letting him take them to Alaska. They don’t even know him. Rachel didn’t want this.”

She clears her throat. “I understand your frustration. Nothing has been decided yet. But here’s my advice.” I close my eyes and take a deep breath, forcing myself to dial it back andlisten. “We need to establish that your home is the most stable place for the children. You said you had an aunt who helped you with the children after your sister passed away--have her come for a visit for a few days. If you have a girlfriend you’re considering proposing to at some point, move that up.”

I balk at that. “Awife? What, like I can’t do this alone because I’m a man?”

This throat clearing feels more assertive. “Mr. Stanton, who’s caring for the children right now?”

“A nanny.”

“When you’re on the road, traveling overnight and on weekends, who’s caring for the children?”

I see where she’s going with this, and my aggravation flares. “Nannies. You want me to quit hockey? Is that what I’ll have to do?”

“No. But we need to show that you havefamilyhelping, not paid nannies.”

“My aunt Rosie is the only family I have left.”

“Then get her there for a visit. And I also need to know, did your sister have life insurance to provide for the children?”

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