Page 42 of Vasily the Nail

This is Camilla. I love her to bits. She’s truly my best friend. And we were probably cut from the same stencil when we were little, but we grew into two very different people. I love that about us, but I really didn’t want to know that she thought Vasily’s too-arrogant-to-admit-he’s-American voice was that sexy.

And that he’s yummy.

I’m horrified by the way she says it. Truly. But as I dump the powder all over the carpet, giving it a good coating, I get a vision of that moment when Vasily’s cock was in my mouth and his eyes met mine. There was such a gentle affection — probably blowjob-induced — but it made me so happy. And yes, that voice is sexy when it’s saying dirty things that I shouldn’t like. Yes, he’s yummy, although I like the ‘hanging out in front of the TV orin front of the stove’ version of Vasily and the Vasily who made stupid jokes and pointed at every single squirrel while we circled the park for hours yesterday just as much.

I like him.

Oh man.

This has got to be Stockholm Syndrome.

“I do wish Gino hadn’t shown you the video,” I mumble as I plug the cord in.

“He needed me to confirm it was you. Again, we thought you’d been kidnapped and had your virginity stolen like some crazy medieval bride theft. And then I wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt or killed or whatever.”

“Oh, no. You . . . watched the whole thing, didn’t you?”

Camilla is silent for too long before she says, “Yeah, but at least you had fun, right? And, okay, I was absolutely never going to ask this, but were those piercings all over his dick?”

I squeeze my eyes shut, wanting to lie because that’s a private thing that’s going to lead to more questions that I have no answers to because I have nothing to compare Vasily’s equipment to, but a lie wouldn’t do anything but push other questions. “Yes?” I squeak out.

“Fuck that is hot. I’m wet again. Dammit. So how long—are you vacuuming?”

“Yeah, but it’s just a little rug. I’m almost done.”

“Wow, so you’ve just moved right into Baranov’s place and decided to take up housekeeping? Is Tony shitting kittens? Do I need to get Gino on damage control?”

I finish up the vacuuming, ignoring this urge I have to vacuum the rest of the apartment again. Our housekeeper in Phoenix vacuums every day, but I’ve only done it once here. I should probably vacuum everything while I’m thinking of it.

But I do need to explain what’s going on to Camilla, even if it means admitting that I instructed Vasily to make that video.

And also admitting that I pay way more attention than I ever let on when she’s explained the crazy scenes in the books she’s read.

I set the phone to speakerphone so my hands are both free. “I tell you what, if you talk me through your nonna’s ravioli recipe, I’ll tell you everything.”

“Deal.”

Day 7

Analiese

Vasily raves aboutmy ravioli and has a good laugh at the effort Camilla made in getting the phone to me when I tell him it’s her recipe and then have to confess how I was able to get it from her. He texts himself with it so he can get the number and tells me to keep it powered up so he can text or call me when he wants.

I kiss him when he tells me he’ll let me go to my audition on Monday. It’s nothing more than a peck on the lips, and I blush hotly from it like I haven’t literally had his penis in my mouth, but it’s a different sort of thing. I’ve never understood how my friends can have casual sex with people that they’ve just met, but that kiss helps explain it.

I was blindfolded the first time I had sex with Vasily. He didn’t kiss me in the gym until it was all over. There’s a level of intimacy we haven’t experienced yet.

I don’t know that we ever will. I don’t know how Vasily truly feels about me. He considers this temporary, after all. This could be what all new relationships feel like whether you expect them to last two weeks or forever. If my plan works, I don’t know if I’ll be able to build a real relationship with him or if it’ll always be blindfolds and sex from behind where we can’t make eye contact.

That bashful peck on his lips that pinks his cheeks up, too, might be it for us.

It doesn’t help any that he’s home the next morning, but not mentally. When he wakes up, he does his usual morning routine of shaving off the side of a nondescript white pill and using a straw to inhale it before lying back down for a few minutes. He’s slower to get up this time, though, his coffee already cooling by the time he joins me in the kitchen, and instead of a morning cigarette, he smokes a joint with it. After those first few days here, Vasily’s finally been home more since we made that video, but is he really?

If Vasily gets me pregnant, I’ll be a mom at twenty. I’m not going to have the money I was raised to expect from my husband, so I’ll have to decide if Vasily makes enough that I can stay at home with the kid or if I’ll need a job, too.

I have no skills. My dream has always been to work at a local theater, and that’s hardly more than a volunteer job. I’ll love every second of it, and it’s something that a wealthy husband would support because it’ll make him look good, but I can’t imagine I’d make a living in that field.

If Vasily can’t be relied on because he’s high all the time, if his brother gets tired of his antics or there’s a shift in power, where will that leave us?

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