Page 62 of Guarded from Danger

His love for me.

God. How did I get this lucky?

“What do you think?” Xavier asks, a hint of nervousness in his voice. And it’s so sweet seeing this strong man allowing himself to be vulnerable in front of me; I nearly melt into a gooey puddle on the floor. “I wanted to do something special for you, Luce. I know it’s just the apartment, but?—”

Moving into the living room, I meet him halfway across it. “I love it, Xavier. This is… it’s too much. All these flowers…”

He takes my hands in his. “I know you love yellow. And the color… it reminds me of you. Like the sun.”

My brow furrows. “I remind you of the sun?”

“Yes.” Pink touches his cheeks. “You’re like the sun. You make everyone happy when you’re around them. And you just have this glow—” He holds my gaze. “I felt it the first time I met you. This warmth. I couldn’t get enough of it. I couldn’t get enough of you.”

Oh.

My nose prickles with threatening tears, but I force them back. “Xavier. I’m not that special.”

“Yes, you are.” He lets go of my hands, framing my face as he kisses me. “You are very special, Lucy. I still don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’ll do whatever I can to make sure you never regret being with me.”

“I couldn’t.” It’s quick. Fierce. “Xavier. Iloveyou. With all my heart. I will never regret being with you. Ever. Don’t even think that.”

“I just want you to be happy.”

“I am.” Holding his gaze, I repeat, “I am happy. With you. And I don’t know what I did to deserveyou.”

A flicker of darkness shadows his eyes, and I immediately know what he’s thinking. It’s that stubborn guilt again, and I’m not letting it wedge itself further between us. Not now. Not ever.

Clasping his hand, I tug Xavier over to the couch and pull him down next to me. “Lucy?” he asks, his brows rising in surprise. “Don’t you want to see the food?”

“Yes. But first, I want to say something.”

Concern tightens his features. “What is it?”

I take a steadying breath, then say, “It’s not your fault.”

“What?”

“What happened the other day. In the woods. It wasn’t your fault.” As he starts to reply, I rush on. “Just like it wasn’t your fault I had that flashback. Or that I was taken in the first place. I want you to stop blaming yourself.”

Several seconds go by before he responds. “Maybe it’s not my fault that you were taken. But the flashback, it was because I left you. And in the woods… that was my call. I should have known better.”

“I told you I was fine. I thought Iwasfine. AndItold you to go to the meeting. I’m not a child, Xavier. If it’s anyone’s fault that I had that flashback, it’s mine.”

His response is immediate. “No, Lucy. It’s not your fault.”

“Then it can’t be yours, either. It just happened. And I’m fine.”

Another pause, this time longer. “Maybe,” he concedes. “But in the woods?—”

“You heard what Niall and Dante said in the meeting. They went out there with Jade and Sarah. Neither of them thought about it being dangerous. I didn’t think about it. None of us did. So why is it your fault?”

“Because you’re mine to protect.” After a beat, Xavier grimaces. “I don’t mean it like that, Luce. You’re not mine. Not like a piece of property or something. But I love you so much. I need to know you’re safe. And it kills me that I put you in danger?—”

“You didn’t.” Squeezing his hand tightly, I hold his gaze as I continue, “And I’ve been thinking. Maybe those men got on the property. But everything worked like it was supposed to. The alarms went off. We got to safety. Matt and Dante caught them. No one was hurt. You protected me.”

His lips press together. “That’s true. But?—”

“Don’t you think I feel guilty? About those men coming here for me? Sarah and Jade both went through traumatic experiences of their own. And now their safe haven is compromised. That makes me feel terrible.”

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