Page 70 of Guarded from Danger

“It is. And now… Mom said… he needs surgery. And it might not be—” Her voice breaks. “It might not be enough.”

Fuck.

As Lucy shivers in my arms, I say, “I’ll talk to Matt. Find out who the best surgeon is. Make sure your dad sees the best one. And we’ll arrange?—”

“I need to see him, Xavier. Right away. Mom said they’re home, he’s basically just laying in bed, they’re waiting for the appointment with the surgeon and hoping it’s not too late.”

“Of course, Luce.” I hug her to me, pressing soft kisses to the top of her head. “We’ll go over right away.”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

LUCY

This doesn’t feel real.

My dad sick. In heart failure. Possibly dying.

Not my dad.

I know at thirty-five, it’s something I have to consider. That no matter how healthy my parents seem, how active, they aren’t going to be around forever. But I thought I had more time. They’re only sixty-five. People are living into their eighties and nineties these days.

But then again, Kali’s dad passed away when she was in high school. And Remy’s parents were both gone before they hit seventy. So it can happen.

I just didn’t think it would happen to my parents.

Stupid, naïve Lucy, always expecting the best. I should know better by now, after all I’ve seen. Sometimes bad things just happen, and there’s nothing we can do about it.

But what if it’s my fault?

My dad’s been so worried about me. What if the stress of finding out his only child was nearly killed made his heart worse?

The guilt is tremendous. Crushing. Suffocating.

A sob bubbles up in my throat, but I swallow it down. I don’t want to show up at my parents’ house in tears, giving them one more thing to worry about.

When my mom called, I was so excited to talk to her. I couldn’t wait to tell her it was safe to come home. And I’ve been eagerly anticipating one of our long lunches together, so I can really tell her all about Xavier. About how much I love him. How I’m secretly hoping he’ll propose before too long.

What if my dad doesn’t make it to my wedding?

This time, a little sob escapes, so I bite my lip hard, hoping the sting of pain will be a distraction.

Xavier squeezes my hand. “It’s going to be okay, Luce.” He glances away from the road to look at me. Compassion and concern soften his gaze. “Don’t assume the worst. Okay? Let’s just get there, talk to your parents, and figure out things from there.”

My voice wobbles despite my best efforts to keep it steady. “Okay.”

“I already texted Matt,” he says. “He’s researching the best heart surgeons all over the country. So if there’s someone better who can see your dad, Matt will get him in.”

I don’t doubt Matt for a second. And I know my parents can afford to travel anywhere for the best care. But I’m so worried. What if it’s too late? Even the most skilled doctor can only do so much. And the way my mom explained, her voice shaking as she said, “Your father… he’s very ill. We didn’t realize… but he’s gone downhill so quickly. I’m scared for him.”

She’sscaredfor him.

God. I feel like I’m about to vomit all over the car.

“Lucy, sweetheart.” As we come to a stoplight, Xavier looks over at me again. “I know you’re panicking. But it’s not going to help.” His thumb strokes across the back of my hand. “Just try to breathe. Okay?”

He looks so strong. So confident. Even the way he handles the steering wheel with one hand—he’s been holding mine with the other since we got in the car—is totally controlled.

“Okay.” I take a deep breath, at the same time trying to absorb some of his confidence. I try to remind myself that lots of people have heart surgery and come out just fine. That medications can work miracles. And what’s that saying Xavier’s high school coach used to tell him? Don’t borrow trouble?

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