Page 49 of The Man I Love

She guessed he was concentrating on getting the truck out of the city, but upon further inspection he didn’t appear to be stressed in the slightest. He drove a twenty-four-foot moving truck through the streets of New York, yet he actually looked bored. Blank faced. Like a million walls were placed up all around him.

They continued to navigate through neighborhoods, down one-way streets, and out of the city, but the silence between them became like a pressure cooker, slowly boiling; expanding, as though it would soon explode.

He’d worn the same expression all day. The same calm, collected, irritating expression he’d walked into her apartment with over an hour earlier. The same one he’d moseyed through the halls of West Valley with all those years ago in high school.

She couldn’t stop her mind from making comparisons to the last trip they’d taken years ago. When he’d walked into her apartment like he’d owned the place—then walked away with her whole heart a few days later.

Now, he was as stiff as a board. His easy relaxed nature gone, replaced by someone she didn’t quite recognize. Mistrust filled the air between them. They spoke in only business-like tones, like they were speaking of shared real estate. Though instead of an ocean-side villa, they spoke about their child. Their baby, who could be born in as little as nine weeks.

Sam sighed, pulling in a deep breath as she adjusted in her seat for what felt like the millionth time. At one point in their relationship, Tristan told her everything. His hopes, his dreams, his fears…even what he had for lunch. But things had become distant now, so broken that the only thing she knew about him were things she learned from his sister. It was through Renee that she learned he’d been a match for Liam. Through Renee that she learned the bone marrow transplant had worked, and that the cells had begun to multiply.

“Heflewto see you against doctor’s orders, Sam,” Renee said when they’d met for brunch two months earlier. “Hemusthave told you? Youmusthave noticed.”

Samantha remembered that day too well, replayed it over and over almost nightly, but she hadn’t known. She hadn’t even suspected.

She glanced across the truck at him now, unable to keep her eyes from drifting down to his hip. She remembered him limping that day in her apartment, but she’d thought Margaret had hit him with a stick.

“How’s Liam?” She couldn’t stop herself from asking, trying to take away some of the awkward silence in the cab.

Heshifted to face her. “He’s good,” he said, but his eyes were covered by those damned glasses still, making his expression impossible to read.

In truth, she was proud of him for what he’d done—proud of him for putting the hurt between him and his father aside so he could help his brother. That must have been hard for him. She wished she could tell him that, but instead, they spent fifteen more minutes in silence.

Eventually, they veered off the highway, entering a tree-lined street of a suburb in New Jersey. Sam sat a little straighter, realizing that this was the neighborhood where Renee and Phin would raise their child.

It was simple and quaint, like all the photos she and Renee would plaster into their Dream Book when they were young. The Craftsman-style homes, red maple trees flanking the yards, and white picket fences too many to count.

“We’re almost there, aren’t we?” Sam asked though she didn’t really need him to answer. The entire neighborhood looked like something straight out of a movie. Exactly like a place Renee would choose to settle down.

Her eyes latched onto a group of kids in the distance, running down the sidewalk with squirt guns in their hands. Then to a little girl on a red tricycle that fell two beats behind, her bare feet peddling a mile a minute, her blond pigtails blowing in the wind as she tried to catch up.

Sam covered her mouth, realizing their childhood fantasy had come true. This was their hopes and dreams, and Renee’s baby would thrive in it.

Soon, Tristan pulled along the curb in front of a blue house with a swing hanging from a tall tree in the front yard. A pebble-stone pathway led to the front porch, where purple hydrangeas grew along the deck.

“Is this it?” Samantha asked Tristan.

His eyes were down, his attention on his phone, but he nodded.

She thought about asking what he was doing, who he was texting, and why he looked so serious, but she heard Renee’s voice in the distance, calling her.

“I thought you’d never get here!” Renee yelled, swaying with her infant daughter on the front deck. “Your niece has been waiting for you all day!”

Opening the door to the truck, Samantha supported her basketball-sized belly and hopped down to the sidewalk.

“Come inside.” Phin appeared beside her, wrapping his arm around the mother of his child. “Get out of this heat, Sam. You must be dying.”

Together, Phin and Renee looked like the epitome of a perfect family.Sam took a deep breath, then glanced over to Tristan again, who was still inside the truck, looking down at his phone. She closed the door behind her, a yearning like she’d never felt before, rattling her chest.

Sophia Elizabeth Lombardiwas born on July 7, weighing seven pounds, seven ounces, and was just as loud as her mother.

“Come in, come in,” Phin said, waving them into their living room as his newborn daughter wailed in Renee’s arms.

Tristan had finally gotten out of the truck and joined them in the house. His moodwas unwavering, his legs braced apart, and his eyes shielded by those damned glasses.

Deciding to ignore him, Sam peered around Renee’s new home and took it all in. Light streamed in from every direction, illuminating the windows, the wide paneled oak floors, and the moving boxes that were stacked two high against the wall. They’d closed on this house less than a month ago, and considering Sophia was less than two weeks old, everything looked perfect.

“I’m so glad you guys could make it,” Renee said, swaying back and forth as Sophia whimpered in her arms. It was magical watching them. Seeing her best friend, who months earlier had declared that she had no clue how to be a mother, acting as though she’d been doing this her whole life.

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