Page 66 of Rust and Stardust

So, for three and a half hours, I did my best not to look out the window at the countryside flying by below me. When the plane finally touched down in New York, it was all I could do not to cry out for joy. I never wanted to be in the air again. Ever.

As I stumbled off the plane on shaky legs, the bustling chaos of JFK Airport hit me like a tidal wave. The sheer number of people rushing about made my head spin, and I found myself longing forthe wide-open spaces of Sagebrush. I'd never seen so many folks packed into one place before, all of them seeming to know exactly where they were going while I stood there, lost and overwhelmed.

I followed the crowd, hoping they'd lead me to baggage claim. My single duffel bag looked pathetic next to the fancy designer luggage on the carousel. As I waited, I pulled out my phone, thumb hovering over Lucas's number. Should I call him? Let him know I was here?

No, I decided. I wanted to surprise him. To see the look on his face when he realized I'd flown all this way just for him. However, it was still early in the day and there was a good chance he was still at work. Although I didn’t expect he’d have a job for long. At the very least, I could call a cab and get some lunch. After that I’d go to his apartment.

I stepped out of the airport, immediately assaulted by the cacophony of honking horns, shouting voices, and the acrid smell of exhaust. My eyes widened as I took in the towering skyscrapers that seemed to touch the clouds. This was a far cry from the rolling prairies and open skies of Sagebrush.

“Taxi!” I called out, mimicking what I'd seen in movies. A yellow cab screeched to a halt in front of me, and I climbed in, my boots scraping against the worn floorboard.

“Where to, cowboy?” the driver asked, eyeing me in the rearview mirror. I really wished people would stop calling me that.

I hesitated, realizing I had no idea where to go. “Uh, somewhere I can get a good burger?” I ventured.

The driver chuckled. “Tourist, huh? I know just the place. You’ll love it.”

Twenty minutes later I stepped out of the cab in front of a McDonald’s feeling duped by the driver. It wasn’t exactly what I imagined when I thought of the New York experience, but at least it was familiar. Although, once I was inside, the fifteen registers run by cashiers speaking several languages I didn’t recognize was a far cry from any small town fast food joint I’d been in.

I managed to order a burger and fries, then found a small table near the window. As I ate, I watched the endless stream of people hurrying by outside. Everyone seemed to be in such a rush, so different from the laid-back pace of life back home. There was so much going on that I found my world drifting out of focus as I ate, desperately trying to find a little bit of peace inside my own mind.

My thoughts drifted back to Lucas of course. What would he think when he saw me here? Would he be happy? Angry? I'd come all this way on impulse, driven by the ache in my heart that hadn't subsided since he left. But now, surrounded by the bustle of the big city, doubt began to creep in.

I pulled out my phone again, this time opening up the photos app. There he was, smiling back at me from the screen. We'd taken that picture the day before everything fell apart, his arm slung casually around my shoulders as we sat side by side at the top of the ferris wheel. The sun had caught his golden earring just right, making it sparkle like a tiny star. I remembered how my heart had raced when he'd leaned in close, his lips grazing against my neck.

I swiped to the next photo, taken just moments later. Our lips were locked in a passionate kiss, the sprawling Texas landscape spread out behind us. It had felt like we were on top of the world in that moment, like nothing could ever come between us.

But something had. The truth.

I sighed, putting my phone away and pushing the remnants of my meal aside. It was time to face him at last. I hailed another cab, this time armed with Lucas's address. As we wove through the congested streets, my nerves started to get the better of me. What if he slammed the door in my face? What if he had already moved on?

The cab pulled up in front of a towering apartment building, all glass and steel. I paid the driver and stepped out onto the sidewalk, craning my neck to look up at the imposing structure. It looked like one of those buildings in old eighties cop movies, the ones the bad guys always ran into to get away from the cops. This was where Lucas lived? It was a far cry from the rustic charm ofmy ranch house back in Sagebrush even if it was a little old-fashioned.

I took a deep breath, steeling myself, and pushed through the metal and glass door into the lobby. I half expected a doorman, but there was no one. On one side was a pair of doors to a stairwell and on the other was a pair of rickety old elevators that looked like they’d seen better days. The lobby itself was empty, bereft of any sign of life except for a single ficus tree that looked like it was on the verge of death. The place had no warmth to it, just cold tile, cold beige walls, and cold glass windows. It didn’t feel like a home at all. So, maybe the old ranch house wasn’t so bad after all. In fact, I counted myself lucky.

I hesitated for a moment, then decided to take the stairs. After that plane ride, I wasn't too keen on being in any more enclosed spaces flying through the air if I could help it. By the time I reached Lucas's floor, which was far further than I imagined, I was breathing heavy, my boots clomping loudly in the empty stairwell.

The hallway was just as stark and unwelcoming as the lobby. I found Lucas's apartment number and stood there, my heart pounding. This was it. No turning back now. I raised my fist and knocked firmly on the door.

Silence.

I knocked again, louder this time.

“What now, Logan?” a familiar voice called from within. “Do we have to castrate pigs or something while we’re there too?” The handle turned and the door swung open. “What’s…”

The whole world went still.

There he was. Lucas Greene, the man who'd stolen my heart and then shattered it. He looked different here - his hair was disheveled and there were dark circles under his eyes like he hadn’t been sleeping. Behind him I saw the apartment was already starting to be torn apart and two suitcases were lying open in the middle of the room, half filled with clothing. He must’ve lost his job after all. And now he was going to lose his apartment.

Lucas's green eyes widened in shock, his mouth falling open as he took in the sight of me standing there in his hallway in my cowboy hat and boots. I must’ve looked terribly out of place, and I couldn’t tell if he was happy to see me or not. For a long moment, neither of us spoke. The air between us crackled with tension.

“Beau?” he finally whispered, his voice hoarse. “What... what are you doing here?”

I swallowed hard, suddenly unsure of what to say. All the speeches I'd rehearsed on the plane seemed to evaporate from my mind. “I… I came to see you,” I managed.

Lucas ran a hand through his messy hair, looking flustered. “But… why?”

“Can I come in?” I asked, shifting nervously. “Then we can talk.”