Page 18 of Rust and Stardust

Chapter 8

Lucas

Ihad never been so scared and turned on at the same time in my life. When that horse took off for the horizon, I thought I was going to die. But when Beau not only rescued me, but when he caught me in his arms and whispered to me until I calmed down… well, let’s just say my heart did some things I didn’t know it was capable of.

I could still feel the warmth of his strong arms around me, the roughness of his calloused hands as they steadied my trembling body. Beau's blue eyes locked onto mine, concern etched across his sun-weathered features.

“You alright there, city boy?” he drawled, his deep voice sending shivers down my spine.

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. My legs felt like jelly, and I wasn't sure if it was from the wild ride or from being this close to Beau. The scent of leather, hay, and something uniquely him filled my senses.

He didn't let go right away, and I found myself hoping he never would. The Texas sun beat down on us, but I barely noticed the heat.All I could focus on was the way Beau's muscular chest rose and fell with each breath, how his blonde hair caught the light, and the way his skin felt against my own.

Before I knew what I was doing, I leaned forward, wrapping my hand around the back of his neck and pulled him into a kiss. For a moment, Beau tensed, and I feared I'd made a terrible mistake. But then, with a low groan, he melted into the kiss, his arms tightening around me. His lips were surprisingly soft against mine, a stark contrast to the rough blond stubble that scratched my chin.

The world around us faded away - the endless prairie, the distant lowing of cattle, even the horse that had nearly been the death of me. All that existed was Beau, his strong body pressed against mine, his fingers tangling in my hair as the kiss deepened.

When we finally broke apart, both breathing heavily, Beau rested his forehead against mine. His blue eyes, usually so guarded, were dark with desire.

“Well, I'll be damned,” he murmured, his Texas drawl even more pronounced.

Then, as if he’d been suddenly bitten by a snake, he leaped backwards, stuffing his hands in his pockets. Those blue eyes were no longer full of desire, but fear. He turned them to the ground, scuffing his boot through the dust. I stood there for a moment, trying to figure out if I’d gone too far. It took a moment before I realized he was shaking.

“Are you alright?” I asked, forgetting about my own near-death experience.

Beau didn't answer right away, his gaze still fixed on the ground. When he finally looked up, his eyes were a storm of emotions - desire, fear, and something that looked a lot like shame.

“I... I can't,” he whispered, his voice barely audible over the rustle of the prairie grass. “This ain't... it ain't right.”

My heart sank. I took a step towards him, but he flinched away. “Beau,” I said softly, “there's nothing wrong with what just happened. It's okay to feel-”

“No!” he cut me off, his voice sharp. “You don't understand. I'm a Turner. We've been ranchin' this land for four generations. I can't... I can't be...”

He couldn't even say the word, but I knew what he meant. I’d seen that look plenty of times before with first timers. They wanted it so bad, but the world had convinced them they were sick or disgusting in some way. It wasn’t true, of course, but telling them otherwise wasn’t going to help. They had to figure it out on their own.

“Beau, I'm sorry if I?—”

“No,” he cut me off, finally looking up. The pain in his eyes was raw, almost tangible. “You ain't got nothin' to be sorry for. It's me. I'm the one who...” He trailed off, running a hand through his tousled blonde hair.

I took a tentative step towards him, but he flinched away. “Beau, it's okay. We don't have to?—”

“I think it’s time for you to go,” he said, his voice cracking. “I… uh… have chores to do.”

I didn’t have to be told twice. Beau needed some space, and I was too grateful for his help to push him any further. I reached out, grabbing Daisy by the bridle.

“Alright,” I nodded. “I’ll bring her up and then I’ll go.”

He nodded right back, keeping his lips tightly sealed.

I led Daisy back to the stables, my mind reeling from what had just transpired. The kiss with Beau had been electric, passionate, everything I'd dreamed it might be. But the aftermath... that had been heartbreaking.

As I secured Daisy in her stall, I heard the crunch of boots on gravel. My heart leaped, thinking it might be Beau, but when I turned, I found myself face-to-face with one of the older men I’d seen butchering the cow out front.

“Well, howdy there, city slicker,” the man said, his weathered face creasing into a smile. I noticed he had the same bright blue eyes as Beau. “Heard you had quite the adventure out there.”

I nodded, trying to keep my expression neutral as Beau shifted nervously beside me. “Yes, sir. Beau saved me from a runaway horse and nasty fall.”

His eyes twinkled. “That's my boy. Always been one to help others in need.” He paused, smiling to himself as Beau tried to act like he wasn’t listening. “He gets that from his mother.”

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