Page 26 of Shadow and Skulls

“Kelsie, what are you doing home so early?” my mom asks as I quickly jump aside.

My dad steps in behind her. He gives me a quick peck on the top of my head as he walks around me, heading toward the stairs.

“Oh, I thought I’d call it a night so I could say goodbye to Dad before he leaves in the morning.” I shrug, walking over to the fridge. God, I hope they didn’t catch the tremble in my voice.

My dad pauses at the bottom of the steps. “How did you know I was leaving tomorrow?”

Mentally, I kick myself. I pull the milk out slowly, giving myself time to respond. “I overheard some of the guys talking about getting ready for the run tomorrow.”

He and my mom exchange a look.

“It sounded like it was important,” I continue, hoping they don’t ask me who it was. Club business is supposed to stay behind closed doors. I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.

Dad sits down at the counter, watching me pour cereal into a bowl. “It’s nothing for you to be worried about, okay? I’ll be home before you know it.”

I nod, blinking back tears, because I really do hate it when he leaves. He knows it, too.

“Listen, I was thinking, when I get back, we need to make a trip over to see the sunflowers. Maybe the twins can meet us there.”

He chuckles when I sit down beside him, and my Cheerios spill over the bowl. “Yeah, that would be great.”

My mom gives both of us a hug. “I’m going to go up and get your bags ready for you.”

“I can …” my dad begins to say.

She covers his mouth with her hand. “I know you can, but I like to take care of my man.”

He gives her a little love tap on the butt before she heads up the stairs. What I wouldn’t do for a relationship like theirs.

When his focus returns to me, the smile falls from his face. He reaches over and wipes a runaway tear from my cheek.

“So, I take it you’re not home early to say goodbye to dear old dad,” he guesses.

I shove a huge amount of cereal into my mouth, so I don’t have to answer.

“I’m a very patient man, Kelsie.”

I watch as he gets up and pours himself a bowl of cereal too. He isn’t giving up, but do I really want him to?

“Jason and I broke up.”

“What happened?” His spoon begins to drown Cheerios under the milk with a little too much gusto, milk spilling over the edge.

“Mom’s going to kill us both if we keep making a mess,” I laugh, grabbing a paper towel and handing it to him.

“What’s going on, sweetheart? You haven’t been yourself for weeks now.”

Myself.I don’t even know who that is. A cheerleader? Jason’s girlfriend? A model student? The quiet girl hiding behind a book?

Big Dan and Lily have always encouraged me to do what I want, so I can’t blame them if I haven’t been authentic. I have no one to blame but myself. I don’t know what I want. I’ve just been busy trying to fit in … to benormal.

“I’m just really confused right now, I guess.”

He gives me his full attention as he continues to eat. “What about?”

I release a long breath. “I feel like I’m one of those plate spinners, you know? Constantly running around trying to keep all of them going, so none of them fall and break. I was able to do it for a long time, but I can’t keep up anymore and my plates are crashing to the ground.”

“Well, that makes it easier to keep what’s left spinning.”

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