Page 15 of Shadow and Skulls

I’m kicking rocks around the junkyard, half-heartedly looking for treasures for my mom’s shop. It’s the perfect place to hide while playing hooky from school. Plus, I know Tank won’t find me here.

Someone groans from inside one of the cars, making me jump. But I quickly recognize the cursing that follows.

“Ash?” I ask, hesitantly peeking in the window of a rusted El Camino. He waves his bottle at me, sloshing the foul-smelling liquid over the rim.

“Ash,” I sigh, climbing in through the open window after trying to pry on the door unsuccessfully.

He gives me a crooked smile. “Fancy meeting you here.”

“I thought we talked about this.” I grab the bottle out of his hand before he registers what I’m doing. I hold it out the window and pour it out.

“Kelsie,” he groans, pushing his fingers in his hair.

“No. We talked about this. You need to accept your sister’s offer and get some help. There’s no shame in that.”

There was a time I had a crush on Ash, but I realized early on a romantic relationship was not in the cards for us. Not that we aren’t friends … we are. That was what he needed from me. So I put my feelings aside to be there for him, and as time passed, they began to change. I love him dearly, but it’s the same kind of love I feel for the twins.

“I want to …” Ash says quietly, beginning to rock himself back and forth.

“Then you’re halfway there,” I tell him, scooting to the middle of the seat and wrapping my arm around him.

He laughs harshly, finally turning his red-rimmed eyes my way. “How do you figure?”

“You have the desire to quit. Now you just have to act.”

Tears spill down his scruffy cheeks as he closes his eyes. “I do want to quit,” he whispers, laying his head on my shoulder.

I squeeze him tighter. “Why don’t you let me give you a ride to the farm?”

He nods, chuckling sadly. He wipes his nose on the sleeve of his flannel. “You must think I’m the biggest loser you’ve ever met.”

I wait for him to look me in the eye, and when he does, I tell him what I think. “What I think is you’re a man who has experienced things he can’t unsee.”

He blinks at me as I continue.

“It was a sacrifice you were willing to make for your country, but more importantly, your sister.”

His head falls forward.

“I know you think you failed her, but it couldn’t have been any other way.” I reach over and grab his hand. “Willow would never have met Jackson, and I wouldn’t have found your survival guide.”

He rubs his arm over his eyes. “I’m no hero, Kelsie.”

My gaze bounces over his face. “You’ve given everything and expected nothing. I think that’s the very definition of a hero.” I hand him the empty bottle still in my hand. “But you’ve given so much of yourself that you’ve drained yourself dry. You need to fill yourself back up, but not with this.” I tap the glass with my nail.

He pulls me to him, kissing me lightly on my hair. “You remind me so much of Willow.”

I snuggle against him, soaking up all the comfort I can from a man who doesn’t make me feel the bad feeling. My fingers trail over my throat, absently searching for the necklace Charlotte gave me.

“Oh no!” I bolt upright, patting myself down, praying the necklace is just caught on my clothes.

“What’s wrong?” Ash asks, helping me look even though he has no idea what I’m looking for.

He avoids my chest as his hands roam over me.

“Charlotte’s necklace. She gave it to me today, and I’ve already lost it.”

Ash pulls my hair up to see if it’s stuck under it. “It’s okay, Kelsie. Don’t cry.”

---