Page 70 of Roses and Skulls

As soon as he steps out, I’m hugging my father.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t understand. I just assumed you all thought I was weak. But I understand now.”

He hugs me tight. “I’ve never thought that. If anything, I think you’re too tough for your own good.” He kisses me on the top of my head before releasing me. “Please be careful.”

I nod before waving to him on my way out. The sun is bright today and I feel like the world is at my feet. I haven’t cut myself for an entire day and the best news is my parents aren’t locking me up. It’s been my biggest fear. Ever since I was trapped in the pickup, I’ve been claustrophobic. Just having the seatbelt on gives me anxiety.

“Ready?” Elijah asks, opening the passenger door to the rod.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

When I give Lily the chime I made for her, she starts crying. She’s known for making things out of motorcycle parts. It’s her signature collection. This chime is made of old bike springs. “This one has always been my favorite,” she says, running her fingers over it.

I tell her the reason behind my making them and the tears fall harder. I don’t mean to make everyone sad, but Grandpa Bill belongs to them too and they deserve to know his final words. Maybe it will help them somehow.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so rude and that I lied about not being able to speak,” I tell her, rubbing my hand over her back.

“I understand. We all hold onto our secrets as long as we can.”

My gaze bounces over her face. I can’t see Lily having any secrets. She’s the most honest person I know. But I guess you never know what someone’s been through. Just look at my mom.

“Do you need me today?” I ask. “I can work, but if you don’t need me I have a few more chimes to deliver.”

She smiles at me. “I’ve got it today. I think I’m going to close down early. Your mom and I are going out for drinks tonight.”

I pull my head back. “Oh, well, I hope you have fun. She was a little sad when I left her.”

Aunt Lily pushes me towards the door. “Don’t you worry about her. I’ll have her cheered up in no time.”

Elijah smiles at me when I get back in the rod, his arm resting on the back of my seat. “Your face looks brighter with each chime you deliver.”

We spend the rest of the afternoon making the rounds to club members. Every single one of them forgives me for the way I’ve been acting. Most just saying I reminded them a lot of my mom.

I usually brush it off but the more I hear it, the more I wonder if it’s true. God, I wish. She’s beautiful and courageous and strong. Yeah, I say she annoys me and sometimes she does but if I could be like anyone, it would be her.

Dan sits across his table from me, staring at the chime I’m gifting him. This one is made of tattoo gun parts. I didn’t realize until I saw them all hanging together on the mountain that they each reminded me of someone in my family.

The twins took Elijah out back to do a little practice shooting. Uncle Dan and the boys cleared some of the trees out back for a shooting range a few years ago.

Finally, Dan speaks. “Your mom came to me when she was fourteen, dumping a whole can of change on my counter, wanting a tattoo.” He knocks on the wood of the table. “I didn’t realize how much that little girl would change my life.”

“Did you give her a tattoo? Because if so, she’s going to have some explaining to do since she made me wait until I was eighteen.”

He chuckles. “No, not when she was that young, but it was the start of our friendship.”

I bite my lip and look down at my lap. “I’m sorry I haven’t been a very good friend lately.”

“That’s life, kiddo. Sometimes, we do things we aren’t proud of but you’re making it right.”

My hands rub over the tops of my jeans nervously. “I’m worried about the meeting. I don’t know how you guys are going to take what I have to say.”

“Sweetheart, there isn’t anything you could tell us that would make us stop loving you.”

Eventually, the guys come back inside, and the rest of the club officers roll up one by one. The rumble of each bike pulling in only tightens the knot in my stomach.

I walk out to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of water, the quake of my fingers sending water over the edge of the glass. A warm body presses against mine. Elijah braces his arms on each side of me. “Relax,” he whispers, his breath hot on my ear.

I take a drink. Easy for him to say. He’s not the one who lied to the club for almost three years.

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