Page 36 of Roses and Skulls

And then the world stops spinning, and I shove the jack in box right back down where he belongs. Slowly, I straighten, wiping the tears from my eyes with the palms of my hands. “Oh, dad, sometimes you’re priceless. Elijah is the last thing you should be worried about.”

My dad’s eyebrow cocks.

Not this time, dad.

“You want to know why I’m angry?”

“I asked, didn’t I?”

I pull my shoulders back and then with as much venom as I can muster, I spew word vomit all over the place. “I’m angry because this entire club has seemed to have forgotten their fucking oath.”

My dad stands slowly, his eyes never leaving mine.

I take a step towards him. “You throw a party for everything under the sun while Bill rots in the ground.”

“Be very careful what you say next,” he warns.

Narrowing my eyes, I take another step forward. I tip my head, looking up at him. He looks down at me, and I can already see the disappointment forming. I wonder how let down he was when he found out he was having a daughter and not a strong son. Someone who could take his place someday.

“I’m angry because the club failed him, they failed me…you,you failed me.”

Elijah returns and is literally at my back. “Billie Rose, not like this,” he cautions.

“But it is like this. Can’t you see? I’m trapped. You might as well have left me in the pickup to die right alongside grandpa, because it would have been better than living like this.”

My dad flinches, his mood ring eyes turning a sad black.

I back away from him, bumping into Elijah before shoving him away. “I have to go get ready for work.” I wave a hand in dismissal as I head towards the stairs.

It’s then I notice the entire club just heard my rant, thanks to Raffe leaving the door wide open. I drop my face towards the ground and leave them all behind. Just like they left grandpa and me.

While I’m putting makeup on for the first time since the night of my last high school dance, I ignore my mom standing behind me. She watches as I work meticulously to turn myself into the woman who’s going to set things straight. I’m going to get justice for Bill.

When I finish, I stand up and pull my leather pants a little higher over my hips. I stare at my reflection in the mirror before finally shifting them to look at the older version of myself, her arms crossed over her chest.

“Whatever is going on, you don’t have to do it alone,” she says quietly.

“I’m just going to work. Hard to believe, I know, but I actually got a job all by my little ole self.”

She smiles sadly. “Oh, how I’ve yearned to hear your voice.”

My thighs tingle, the urge to cut courses through my veins, the blood begging to be freed.

“Where are you working?” she asks as if we’re just two friends bumping into each other on the street.

I sling a bag over my shoulder, answering shortly, “The Black Rose.”

She wraps her arms over her stomach. “The bar,” she whispers to herself.

“The bar,” I repeat. “Lanie’s boyfriend, Draven, offered me a job when I was there the other day, you know, rescuing the crow,” I remind her.

“Billie Rose,” she breathes out. I know she came in here prepared to back me up. She wants to be the good cop so to speak but there is no good cop in this situation.

I hold my hand up. “I know he is a Devil. I don’t care. I want to work there. It reminds me of grandpa.”

The lines under her eyes soften immediately. “I understand, hun, but men like Draven are dangerous.”

I struggle to keep the color of my eyes steady. Any flicker of change and she’ll pounce. She’s good at reading them. She’s had years of practice with my dad.

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