Page 100 of Sugar and Skulls

As I drive to the address Crow gave me, which I’m fairly sure is his clubhouse, I try not to think about Raffe. I try not to think about the way he smiled at me when I first met him. I try not to think about how he sacrificed himself for Dirk and me.

Tears streak through my makeup. It’s fitting my tears are washing her away. This is the last time I’ll have to be her. After today she won’t exist. One more time. The burden will be hers. It has to be.

When I get there, I slide my pistol in the back of pants and stuff my knife in my right boot. I don’t know if I’ll survive this. If I don’t at least I’ll die knowing my family is safe. Crow will have gotten what he wanted, destroying me.

Tiptoeing through the building I quickly realize that there is no one here. As I’m leaving I notice a trail of blood leading outside. Maybe I hit him at Bell’s or maybe one of his own men got him by accident.

Walking out into the hot desert sun I pull Jimmy’s phone out of my pocket and call Crow. It rings several times before he picks up. “Where the fuck you at?” I demand.

“You’re not the only who protects what’s theirs.”

I pull the phone away from my ear, staring at Jimmy’s phone. How the…oh, oh shit.

“I think you’ve risked your life enough for one day, Jesse.”

“What did you do with him?” I ask Dirk.

“I hauled his ass straight to your hell., just like you planned. See you soon.” He hangs up before I have a chance to ask anything else.

My hands shake as I drive to the railyard. How did Dirk know where my hell was? He must have followed me the last time I was there. But, my cars are locked.Like a lock would keep him out.

The railyard is empty. What the fuck, where are all the squatters? I shut Sylvia’s engine off and then pick my way through the railcars until I get a few yards from the ones I’ve claimed as my own. Dirk is leaning against the one that contains my own personal hell. A cigarette hangs from his lips, his feet crossed at the ankles and a bored expression on his skeleton face.

He painted his face.

“Well, hello, Sugar,” he says in his gravelly voice.

I want to run into his arms and make him tell me Raffe is okay. But, that doesn’t happen.

I point to his face. “So, what’s your street name?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “Most people on the street call me asshole.”

My gaze drops to the ground as I toe an empty can lying on the ground. He takes a few steps towards me. His cigarette drops in front of me. I watch as he stomps it with his booted foot then he takes a few more steps and wraps me up in the comfort of his arms.

His breath stirs the hair on top of my head as he speaks. “We need to wrap this up. Raffe is going to need us.”

He’s still alive!

His next words douse my relief.

“The bullet grazed his spinal cord. They aren’t sure he will ever walk again. He got out of surgery right before I left. We need to be there when he wakes up.” He squeezes me tighter as if he can hear the grief spilling out of my heart.

Dirk release me and slides the door open on my railcar of hell. Crow is sitting on the floor tied up and bloodied. He blinks a few time, one eye almost completely swelled shut. He laughs when he sees me. “There’s my girl,” he says. Dirk grunts behind me but doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even move.

I step inside the car, my eyes roam over my paintings, over my demons. When they land on Crow he smirks.

“I’m proud of myself. Looks like I accomplished what I set out to do. You’ve had a tortured life haven’t you?” he says.

I don’t say anything.

“You haven’t figured it out yet have you?” he taunts.

I squat down in front of him. He shifts trying to reposition himself more comfortably. “You mean have I figured out that you’ve had a part in all of this?” I pull my knife out of my boot and motion over the walls of the car.

He licks his lips, his eyes focused on my knife.

Dirk leans against the door casually. His presence is a gift from Gabriel’s god.