He’s shutting down. Don’t do this.
“I have an IUD. It’s fine.” I bite my bottom lip, thinking about his cum inside me as I lay here talking to him. “I liked it.”
His arms raise above his head, his arm muscles flexing as he grips his hair. “I’m such a fucking asshole.”
“No. You’re not.” I grab one of his wrists, tugging it down. “Ash, look at me.”
He won’t.
“Asher.” I’m firm this time, and his head swivels to the side as myeyes forcefully hold his attention. “I’m a grown woman who wanted to have sex. Do not feel guilty or make me feel guilty about really good sex.”
“I don’t want a fucking relationship. Ever. Fucking a single mom, that’s not smart when you’re a guy who doesn’t want commitment.”
I sit up, finding my shirt and pulling it on and then get up, finding my jeans, skipping the panties and pull them on as he cautiously pulls his sweats up and sits up, watching me. “I don’t want a commitment either. I’m not lying to you. This isn’t some trick to get you to marry me. Asher, I was planning on screwing some random stranger tonight.”
And I was. Even if I was a little nervous. I was 90 percent sure I would go through with it.
“But you ended up fucking me.”
I sit on the bed, trying to ignore the wet feeling between my legs. “I did. And I’m not sorry.”
“Not yet.” His hand sweeps through his unruly locks, and his lips pout.
“Not ever. I wanted this. I would do it again. And again.”
“Exactly.”
“No.” I shake my head. “Just the sex part. I’m not looking to marry you.” I smile. “You aren’t my type.”
He rolls his eyes, but I see the slight smirk he can’t hide. “Right. I definitely don’t have it together.”
“I like that about you. The spontaneous part. I want to be more like that, but not forever. Someday I want a relationship, but I meant what I said. For now, all I’m looking for is sex. Dirty, hair-pulling, biting, hot sex.”
He’s looking at me like he’s trying to decide if I’m lying or delusional. “What are you saying?”
I shrug. “I’m not saying anything except for I don’t regret having sex with you tonight, and I’m not looking for a proposal.”
“And going forward? Do we just pretend like it never happened?”
“I don’t want to do that.” I stand up, not really wanting to leave, but I don’t want him to think I’m going to cling to him, that I’m needy. “I don’t know about you, but I’ll be using this for a while.”
He smirks again. “So do we say ‘never again’?”
I don’t want that either. “I never say never, and I’m up for it if you are.”
“Viv, what about Sebastian?”
I take a deep breath, never wanting anything to hurt my son. “He is always the priority, no matter what. As far as he’s concerned, nothing has changed. You’re his uncle. I’m his mom, and that’s it. What we do after he goes to bed is our business.”
“You’re a smart woman, but you know this is stupid, right?”
I shake my head and fold my arms. “Only if we act stupid. As long as we both know what we’re in for, we can’t get hurt.”
He stands up, towering over me, and my hands drop to my sides as his hands cup the sides of my face. “I don’t think it’s that simple.”
“It is. I only have one request.”
His eyes search mine. “What’s that?”