Page 38 of Queens and Monsters

“Hi,” I said, fighting back tears.

“Fuck, Jasmine.”

My lips curled at his pronunciation:Jazz-mean.

“I’m so sorry I haven’t been in touch.”

“Preciosa, I’ve been worried. Have you gotten my text messages? I was beginning to think you were blowing me off.”

Warmth filled my cheeks at his concern and use of the endearment. I took the last part literally. “No to the text messages, and I’ve never done the other thing…but maybe someday.”

Something sounding like a primal growl came through the phone. “When we’re together, I’ll let you read each and every one I wrote. I want to see your cheeks grow pink as you read the ways I want to make you feel good.”

My cheeks were getting hotter imagining what they might say. “I’d like to read them. You can read the ones I sent as well.” I thought about the warring cartels. “Are you safe?”

“Sí. As safe as we are in this world. We’ve lost good soldiers.”

Em? I wanted to ask.

“Anyone I would know?” I tried.

“No, Emiliano is still alive.”

“Dario told me” —my voice softened— “that he recommended another woman to Jorge for you.”

“A girl, not a woman. And I toldmí papáthat it doesn’t matter. My mind is set.”

His words gave me some confidence. “Isabella is a Luciano.”

“The only thing that matters to me is that you will be a Roríguez.”

“He’s promised me to someone else.”

Rei’s volume rose. “That’s not possible.”

Tears streamed down my cheeks. “He doesn’t think I’m worthy of you.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“There’s something else you should know,” I said with a tightening in my chest. “There’s a reason I’m not good enough…” I let the words spill out. “When I was three years old, my biological mother was incarcerated. She was given a twenty-year sentence. All I know is that she’s out of prison now and wants to see me.”

“I didn’t know she was out.”

I sat taller and wiped my eyes. “You knew about her?”

“Sí. She doesn’t matter. Your past isn’t as important as our future.”

“Doesel Patr?nknow? If he does, he probably doesn’t want you to marry?—”

“He knows.”

“I don’t want to marry someone else.”

“I told you what would happen if you did.”

His words came back—I’d be a widow before my marriage was consummated.

Rei lowered his tone. “Tell me who the capo promised you to.”

---