Page 3 of No Longer Safe

Carina rolled her eyes, leaning back with a dreamy smile. “Ace’s parents are handling everything. They wouldn’t even let us pay if we wanted to. In their world, asking to chip in would be an insult.”

My jaw nearly dropped. Heir to a fortune, a family that owned mansions… I tried to picture it, but it felt like stepping into a movie, one that didn’t fit with the life I knew—the safety I knew.

“Wow, Carina. This is… huge,” I managed, still processing. “This is really happening.”

She reached across the table, squeezing my hand. “And you’re going to be there, Audrey. We’re in this together, just like we always talked about.”

I smiled, but there was a hollowness to it. I wanted to be happy for her, and I was, truly—but her dreams were becoming real, while mine stayed locked away. And as much as I tried toignore it, I could feel the ache of that distance growing between us.

I forced a smile as Carina dove back into another stack of magazines, her voice brimming with excitement. But a question lingered in the back of my mind, one I hadn’t let myself ask in years: if she could take this leap into something unknown, why couldn’t I?

I kickedthe fridge door closed, balancing my phone between my shoulder and ear as the aroma of instant ramen filled the kitchen.

“You knew and didn’t tell me?” I asked, stirring the noodles. Brian, of course, knew that Ace had proposed to Carina—they worked together. But somehow, he’d kept it to himself.

On the other end, Brian’s voice sounded distracted, pinched. “Why would I? You can’t keep a secret.”

I rolled my eyes, taking a bite of ramen, even as irritation flared. I could keep a secret. His mother, the town’s unofficial gossip, was the one who couldn’t. Every “book club” meeting at the coffee shop was just an excuse to dish about everyone’s business. Brian must have been confusing us.

“Anyways, Carina asked me to be her Maid of Honor.” I slurped up another mouthful of noodles.

He hated ramen, especially the instant kind. Once again, it wasn’t ladylike. But I lived on a teacher’s salary and it was easy after the day I had. Between teaching, prepping for class tomorrow, going over all of the details for Carina’s wedding, and researching the hell out of Ace Cristof I hadn’t had the time northe energy to make anything else. There wasn’t much on the internet about him but there was a whole lot on his parents. Their estate in New York was massive and I was right, old money. The home had been in their family for generations. In fact, it was probably always in their family and was built by them back, back, back in the day. The school year was almost over, thankfully, which meant I didn’t have to worry about teaching while being this distracted. There were only a few more weeks left and I would be free. But not exactly because I was going to be shackled to Carina’s side helping with all the weddingbliss.

I heard Brian clear his voice and say “hellloooo are you listening to me? What are you eating?”

I felt my irritation sharpen. “Ramen. Why?”

There was a pause, then that voice I dreaded. “If you’re trying to look good in all those wedding photos, maybe cut back on the carbs.

The noodles tasted like cardboard as I swallowed. I looked down at the cup in my hands, his words pressing on me. Sure, maybe I’d put on a little weight, but I still looked great. I shook off the sting, even though I tossed the noodles into the trash. My appetite was gone now.

“Good girl,” Brian chirped into the phone and my stomach further twisted into knots. I hated nothing more than those two little words.

I changed the subject instead as the TV droned on in the background and Brian’s keyboard clicked on the other end. I would be lucky if I got anything more out of him tonight. It was starting to get lonely. I chewed on my bottom lip. “School will be out in a few weeks, do you think we could go on a vacation?”

What I really wanted to say: We could go on an exotic vacation and you could make an honest woman out of me like your mother insists upon. We could have sex all day and nightand explore places we’ve never been before all while eating incredible food.

It was far-fetched and that was why it stayed within my brain and not voiced out loud. Sexy time was few and far between these days. He didn’t seem to want it and by the end of the day—dealing with other people’s kids—I didn’t want to initiate it. Especially when he eyed whatever I was eating like a hawk on date night or he was too busy and had to hurry back to the office. Sex was quick, lackluster, and I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had an orgasm. I’d faked it so many times that I couldn’t remember a real one. How disappointing. But it would get better, that’s what everyone said. I wasn’t so sure how much I believed it though. Were we almost to that seven-year hump that everyone talked about? Why was it happening earlier?

“Vacation?” His voice had a faraway tilt to it and he sounded distracted again. This conversation would never go anywhere. “Why would we do that? We have everything we need here. It’s safe here.”

There was that word again. Safe. Everything revolved around being safe. I clenched my jaw.

“You’re right, I’m sorry I bothered you while you are so busy,” I closed my eyes. We could have talked about all of this over dinner. That’s what I wanted to do. I was dying to have a connection with him again but it seemed like all of my efforts were futile. What did I need to do? Show up at his work with a trench coat and lingerie?

That was honestly my best idea lately. I could wait for him at home but there were some nights when he slept at the office. He got so wrapped up in whatever he was working on that he fell asleep at his desk.

“It’s okay, babe. I’m just stressed out with work and I don’t know how I could possibly take off time for a vacation. Maybe if we found a safe spot, like another small town with a bed andbreakfast it would be okay. I just don’t know how I can leave all of these cases.”

I rolled my eyes to myself. The town wasn’t that big. “You’re right, I’m sure I’ll be busy with all of the wedding planning anyway.”

“That should be fun for you!”

“Good practice, right?” I encouraged.

“For what?” He didn’t sound distracted again. He sounded confused and slightly annoyed. It wasn’t like I brought up the idea of getting engaged often. But geez, we’d been together for five years. When would the right time be? The same sentence played on repeat in my head—if he wanted to, he would.

Instead of letting it go, I dove right in. “For you to propose to me. For our future wedding.”

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