Page 145 of Encounter

“I will—stick around,” I whispered, to hide my voice trembling. When Chast’s lips spread into the most radiant, genuine smile, I couldn’t hold it in any longer and burst into tears. He brought me in and buried my face in his embrace almost immediately, squeezing me tightly into a hug while I sniffled and dug my fingers into his back.

Please, let this not be a dream. Please.

I couldn’t tell if it was laughs or happy sobs resonating through his body, but I didn’t care. Chast’s smell wrapped around my senses. It felt as if I was hibernating these past few weeks, locked away in the hospital. Now, I could finally smell the air and the flowers and hear the music again.

“No matter how long or how short this can be, I want us to be together,” Chast whispered into my hair, and I nodded vehemently. “I love you. Iloveyou, and I’m sorry I couldn’t get over myself and tell you properly sooner.”

“I l-love you, too,” I mumbled between sobs and squeezed him tighter. “I’ve loved you for a while.”

When he cupped my face and moved it away after a few moments, Chast smiled. He looked at me gently as he wiped the tears and snot off. “How about... you take some time away from your pops and stay with me for a while? We’ll find a new place. Find a way to make things work. We deserve to be happy.”

Did Dad agree to that? Did he finally, for once in my life, think about what I might want? What might make me happy? Did he really care about me?

“I’d like that,” I said, chuckling.

Chast placed a soft kiss on my forehead. “I’d like that too.”

“Can you take me homefor a bit?” I asked Chast as soon as my butt landed in the passenger seat, after squeezing the last box in the back and barely closing the van’s doors. There was no way we were going to fit the remaining few into the van, so we needed to do two trips anyway, and home was on the way.

Confusion flashed over his face, but then he quickly remembered. “Oh, your piano. Right,” he murmured to himself as he started the car. “I think the people know what they’re doin’, but I understand why you’re worried. It’s your baby,” Chast noted, giving me a toothy grin.

Frowning playfully, I hung my hand down and played with my hands, running my fingers over the scar leading up from my wrist. “I know they do. But... I need to be there to see them load it up safely.” It was already a huge deal to me tothinkabout someone moving it, touching it. The possibilities of it breaking flushed my mind anytime I imagined.

That piano, in that room, had been such a significant, stable part of my life for so long, I always thought I couldn’t bear it changing in any way. Now, Iwantedit to—I wanted it to be in our new apartment, to play it for Chast out in the open, to be able to get better again and enjoy what I loved.

It was no longer about escaping from Dad or leaving our house. Now, it somehow symbolized my growth, yet it still scared the crap out of me.

“We’ll drive right behind them and go back for the last few boxes to the old place then. Don’t you worry.” Chast’s warm hand ruffling up my hair brought me back to the moment. Smiling, I nodded and intertwined my fingers with his as he placed his hand on my thigh.

He was with me, continuously reminding me it was all worth it.

I hadn’t been home since before my inpatient stay, so seeing the house again brought strange, unsettling emotions out. The specialist mover’s van already stood outside, and the guys were getting out, so they probably arrived minutes before us.

“Want me to go in with you?” Chast asked after he parked, watching me carefully.

“No,” I whispered, but quickly gave him an assured glance. “I’m alright. Just wait here, please.” I’d only spoken to Dad briefly about the moving and such over the phone, so it was going to be awkward enough without Chast there. He might have come to him before with his blessing for me to stay with Chast—which was something I still had trouble imagining—but I knew he probably still struggled with it all.

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