Page 88 of When You Left Me Speechless

At nine thirty, I brace myself to see her, but Beth walks in alone. The look on my face must say it all because Beth gives me a weird look. “I’ll be helping Freddie today,” she says.

My brain floods with so many questions about what happened to get us to this point.Does Beth know? Why would Poppy not come to my classroom this morning? Did she come to work today?

“Where is she?” My voice is rushed and a little panicked. I immediately regret speaking because I wouldn’t question Beth being here if this was any other person. I shouldn’t care.

Beth looks over to me and cocks her head to the side. “She had a make-up session with a different student. Why?”

My heart starts pounding. I can’t be the one to give this away any more than I already have. I take a deep breath, “I was just wondering.”

Beth blinks and stares at me for a second like she is processing the interaction and then turns back to Freddie. She doesn't mention her for the rest of the class, and neither do I.

Beth walks up to my desk as the kids leave my classroom. She stands there silently with her arms crossed. Her typical happy demeanor is gone; instead, she looks rather annoyed with me.

“Is there something I need to know?”

I blink up at her and then look back down to my laptop.

“What are you talking about, Beth?” My tone is curt, and I know I need to pull myself together, but I can’t find it in myself to do so. She walks over, grabs a chair, and slides in front of my desk. She sits in it backward, leaning on the back of it, arms still crossed.

“I don’t know. You seem on edge, and maybe I’m imagining things, but you really seemed to want to know where my student was this morning.” She pauses. “And then there is my student therapist, who looks like she cried all night andbarely slept. She practically begged me to take Freddie, which is very unlike her. It just all seems rather odd, don’t you think?”

I stop typing and look up at her. “She looks like she has been crying?”

“Yes, and would you happen to know why?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She lets out an annoyed sigh and rolls her eyes. “Logan, if I may, you look like total shit.” Her bluntness makes me choke. “I’ve noticed you two getting close the last few weeks. I mean, when have you ever played a game with the Tuesday Talkers when I was leading the group or kept a bucket of candy in your classroom? I’m not stupid. Did you do something to upset her?”

I shake my head. All I can do is deny. It’s not my place to tell Beth anything, and it’s none of her business either. Kids start to pour into my room and sit down at their desks.

“Beth, I don’t know what you’re trying to insinuate, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I stand and shut my laptop. “Now, if you will excuse me, I have a class to teach.”

She stands up and moves the chair back to its place. She doesn’t speak another word and quickly moves toward the door and down the hall. I breathe a sigh of relief.

The rest of the day, I find myself looking into the hallway at the times I’m used to seeing Poppy walk by my door. She never does. Knowing she is three doors down from me and has been crying feels like some special sort of hell. I wish I could go back in time and change what happened. After my conversation with Beth, all I want to do is kiss Poppy and tell her it’s all going to be okay. But the truth is, I have no idea what our future holds or how to save us.

CHAPTER 54: YOU’RE A SMART GIRL

POPPY

Iknow I look awful, but I don’t care. I barely slept, and despite the eye mask I tried using this morning and the ungodly amounts of concealer I applied, the bags under my eyes let Beth know something is definitely up. To her credit, she doesn’t pry. She just keeps offering me looks of pity. My stomach is in knots, and I just want to go home.

My goal today is to lay low and not see Logan because I don’t think my heart can take it. I only have a few more days of being here, so I just need to keep my head down and stay out of his way. Beth walks back into the speech room, and it takes everything in me not to ask about him. Instead, I try to busy myself with work.

Beth barely speaks to me the rest of the morning. We sit down to lunch, and she finally breaks the silence. “Are you sure you are okay?”

She looks genuinely worried about me. I want to tell her. Part of me wonders if telling someone will make it all okay, but I’m scared.

“I’m fine, promise,” I say in between bites of my sandwich. She gives me a look that says she thinks I’m full of total shit and then goes back to eating her lunch.

Poppy: How am I supposed to get through this week? This is fucking torture, and I think Beth knows something is up.

Olive: Take some deep breaths. It’ll be over soon. Why do you think she knows?

Poppy: Because I practically begged her not to make me go to his class this morning like an idiot, and she keeps looking at me all concerned and asking me if I’m ok.

Olive: I’m sorry babe. Maybe just tell her. Best if she finds out from you and not the principal, you know? She’s cool.

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