Page 136 of The Perfect Love

“Well then, I guess you are too.”

“Perfectly matched.”

His lips find mine again, and even though I’m starving and need to pee, I barely notice. Nothing has ever felt this right. No one has ever made me feel so desired… so cherished before. And I get the feeling no one else ever will. Maybe it’s too soon to know for sure, but I already know he’s my person. I already know I’m in love with him. Now, blooming deep in my gut, is the piercing certainty that he’s more than that. He’s it for me. He’s everything.

17

Lifeline

Chelsea

Winter break has beena whirlwind. It’s already mid-January, and I don’t know how we got here so quickly—except I do. Trevor and I have done all the things. First there was the winter carnival Joel’s brother Jesse organized at the Binghamton Knights stadium. Trevor acted as emcee for the baseball trivia and a few other games. Of course, he had a great time, and watching him full of charisma and sarcastic quips was hot as fuck.

Did I give him a blow job on the way home from there? Maybe.

Every day I feel a little more free with my sexuality, and the big S—sex, or is it the big I for intercourse?—has been on my mind. I’m getting closer to being ready, but that’s going to be a wholeconversation and not something I’m ready to get into while we’re staying with either my family or his mom.

After the winter carnival, it was straight into Christmas things. All the Christmas things as we tried to balance his family and mine. Not to mention taking time for ourselves. The day after Christmas, there was the annual friend group party, which apparently Rae and everyone have at Joel’s house. It’s grown since they were in high school to include lots of other friends. It was a good time. Mostly. Hyla and Mackenzie had a heartbreaking confrontation. I still don’t know all the details there, but it’s clear they still love each other, but there are things holding them back from being together. A part of Hyla has been utterly broken since then, even if she’s trying to play it off otherwise.

Trevor is, unsurprisingly, concerned about it all and wants to fix it. He can’t, so supporting her is all he’s got left. Apparently, that includes going to some dinner with her family in a couple of days. I offered to go if only to be a buffer. They don’t know me and I don’t give a fuck about them, but Trevor said it’s something Hyla wants and needs to do. He doesn’t sound thrilled, but if they’re as awful as he’s said, that’s not surprising.

In the midst of all that, though, we made time for a cozy New Year’s Eve celebration, just the two of us in a little cabin at my family’s campground. It was absolutely freaking perfect and the best New Year’s of my life.

Now, since we didn’t have time to do it at the start of winter break, we’re finally meeting up with Bridget and Lex. At the best bar in Birch Lake, apparently. They still haven’t gotten the message that I don’t like to drink much.

I’m finally comfortable having a little here and there. I had a glass of champagne at Rae and Aaron’s wedding, and Trevor and I split a small bottle of champagne on New Year’s Eve. But other than that, drinking is minimal, and not a social activity I enjoy.But whatever. I’ve decided to meet them where they are, offer whatever friendship I can, and work on being okay with that.

Trevor pulls into a space down the street from the bar and rests a hand on my thigh.

“Are you ready? Because if not, we can go. Run away to Mexico.”

I laugh at that. “Sounds like something someone would say right before the bride walks into a wedding.”

He shrugs. “It’s multi-use.”

“I’m ready. Ish. I just want it to be low-key. I want no drama. But I’m also not willing to let them hurt me anymore, even if it is unknowingly.”

He grunts in that very Trevor way. “I doubt it’s unknowing. But I will go in there with my supportive face on. I’ll be nice. I won’t flip my shit on them. Unless you ask me to.”

I grab his chin between my thumb and fingers. “You’re so cute when you’re respectful of my boundaries while still somehow being all growly and protective.”

“Cute.” He hmphs.

“Sorry. I meantadorable.”

He shakes his head, but can’t keep his smile in. “You’re lucky you’re sexy, gorgeous, smart, kind, and put up with my annoying ass.”

I shrug and fling my door open. “Five out five. Not bad.”

With a wink, I climb out, channeling that inner strength I haven’t needed to rely on in a while. I’ve healed more than I realized in these last few months, and maybe that’s what I’m most afraid of walking into the bar. I don’t want to feel like that broken shell of a person I was before.

Then Trevor steps up beside me and wraps his arm around my back, and I know I won’t feel that way. I’m stronger now, and when I’m not, I have his strength to bolster me.

I’m wearing a shimmery gray sweater dress and heeled boots that make me feel sexy as fuck and give me an extra boost of confidence. Trevor likes it too. At least if the hand resting on my ass is any indication.

When we walk in, I quickly spot Bridget and Lex. They’re at a table at the far side of the bar near a row of windows.

“Hey, bitch!” Lex yells, throwing her hand up in an over-the-top wave.

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