Page 178 of Glow of the Everflame

Maura stared at me with enough pity on her features that I had to look away. “That’s very thoughtful,” she said. “I heard about what you did for the orphanage. They’ve been able to take in twice as many children now, you know.”

I shrugged off her words, though my heart sang with satisfaction. In the weeks since my disastrous meeting with House Hanoverre, I’d realized my opportunity to help the mortals might begin and end with the Period of Challenging. There was little I could do without Remis’s consent as Regent, but I’d managed a few small acts of rebellion.

After watching mountains of food go to waste from the vast buffets offered each mealtime, I’d bribed two kitchen servants into delivering the leftovers to families I knew to be struggling. A number of forbidden books about mortal history and culture had alsomysteriouslygone missing from the palace archives, where they may or may not have reappeared on the shelves of the mortal school bearing the seal of the Crown and a note of exemption from the laws.

I’d even roped Alixe into my scheming. As Luther’s second-in-command in the Royal Guard, she had authority over the Descended who patrolled Mortal City. After a long conversation, she’d agreed to take a more active role in supervising them and remove a number of guards who, unbeknownst to her, were notorious among mortals for their violent ways.

I had no idea if any of these initiatives would survive me, but amid all my screw-ups and strained relationships, these gestures were the only thing that kept the looming darkness at bay.

“Go on then,” Maura huffed, shooing us toward the workroom. “Stay for as long as you need, but keep out of sight, or I’ll have a line of people pretending to be ill just to get a look at you.”

I ushered Lily into the back where I set about explaining each item in the inventory and their various uses. She watched eagerly, jotting down notes and offering thoughtful questions that I would have expected from a much more advanced trainee.

In fact, the longer I watched her expression light up with interest, the more I realized how well-suited Lily would have been as a healer, if she were a mortal. She was studious and responsible, she had a keen mind for plants, and she seemed to derive true joy from helping others, especially to those who were outsiders, as Teller and I had been.

I felt a pang of sadness that her royal status made it nearly impossible for her to have any trade, especially one typically relegated to mortals—only to realize with a start that I was pitying aroyalDescendedfor beingunable to work.

Months ago, I would have sneered at the thought, but lately my eyes had been opened to the two faces of the oppressive regime. The mortals were not the only ones bound by injustice—and the mortals were not the only ones who stood to gain from its destruction.

I set Lily on a task to mix a handful of simple salves that might be useful in treating the everyday scrapes of her younger cousins. After watching and offering occasional advice, I left her to her work and began my own task rereading my mother’s notes on Descended poisons and their antidotes.

Just in case.

“I’ll agree to marry him, you know,” Lily said after a few minutes, her voice almost too soft to hear. She kept her eyes on her work as she mashed leaves in her mortar and pestle. “If it will keep everyone from fighting, I’ll marry Roderyck Byrnum. I don’t mind.”

I shot her a look. “Making other people happy is not the right reason to marry someone, Lily.”

She gave a half-hearted shrug. “Roderyck isn’t so bad. His House is small, but they’re growing fast, and they have business dealings in almost every realm. An alliance with them will be good for House Corbois. And then Luther won’t have to worry about me anymore, and Father won’t be so angry with him or with you. And Teller...”

Her voice faded. Her chin tipped down to hide her face.

“You can help the family in other ways,” I said gently. “After you finish school, you can be my advisor. You could even continue healer training here.”

She shook her head. “If I decline, he might choose Eleanor to marry Roderyck. Why should she have to take my place?”

My hands clenched around my mother’s journals. “No Corbois woman is getting forced into marriage while I live and breathe.”

“We’re not beingforced.” Her tone had grown uncharacteristically defensive. “We’re simply raised to do what’s best for the family. If I tell my father no, he’ll respect it. This is my choice.”

I couldn’t help the roll of my eyes. “Are you sure? Because he—”

“Yes,I’m sure,” Lily huffed. She let out a frustrated sigh. “You’re so much like my brother.”

I balked, unsure whether to take that as a compliment or an insult.

“You both mean well,” she said, “and you both want to protect me. But have either of you asked if Iwantto be protected?”

I started to bite back a response, then stopped myself. Lily’s innate sweetness made it easy to see her as a child, innocent and defenseless against the unforgiving reality of the world, but that was far from the truth. She was clever and incredibly perceptive. She understood how Descended society worked much better than I did. And she was capable of making her own decisions—even if I didn’t like them.

“Perhaps this isn’t everything I want,” she went on, “but you did not want to be Queen, either. You accepted your role, and I can choose to accept mine.”

I set down my notes and joined her at her side, leaning against the worktop with my elbows. “I understand,” I sighed. “Truly, I do. But there is another reason.”

Lily’s eyebrows inched upward.

I traced the chipped wood of the worktable to avoid her stare. I had hoped to not have to share these particular fears that had been haunting me of late. They revealed too much that I was not yet ready to admit.

“If I do not survive the Challenging,” I said slowly, “and Luther becomes King, he will need you. He will need to keep those he trusts close, and there is no one he trusts more than you. If you have left to join House Byrnum...”