Page 92 of The Backup

“Scared of what?”

“Of what it would mean if you actually let yourself be happy for once.”

Her words hit harder than I’d like, and I sit in silence for a moment, chewing on them.

Jacklyn nudges me with her elbow. “Tell you what. Wear something hot, show up, and remind him exactly what he’s missing. Worst case, you have a few drinks, dance a little, and leave. No harm, no foul.”

I glance at the pile of costumes, then at the dress on my bed. Something shifts inside me—defiance, maybe. Or just the realization that I’m tired of hiding.

“Fine,” I say, standing and grabbing the bag I’d shoved under my bed. “I’ll go. But on one condition.”

“What’s that?”

I pull out the costume: a fitted pencil skirt, a crisp white blouse, and a pair of thick-rimmed glasses. “Sexy librarian. And you have to tell me I look hot.”

Jacklyn bursts out laughing. “Oh, honey. You’re going to break hearts.”

A little while later, the doorbell rings, and soon Brian and a few of his friends are sprawled out on our couch, drinks in hand, the buzz of pre-party energy filling the apartment. Jacklyn is holding court in her Cleopatra outfit, her confidence practically shining through the room. She laughs loudly at something Brian says, tossing her hair like she knows exactly how good she looks.

I sit at the edge of the group, nursing a beer and trying not to feel out of place.

Brian turns toward me, leaning back against the arm of the couch with a grin. “Hey, Sloane, you’re coming to the party, right? Jacklyn said you were on the fence.”

I shrug, sipping my beer. “I guess so.”

“Good,” he says, raising his drink. “It wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Jacklyn snorts, nudging him with her foot. “You’re such a politician.”

Brian grins, catching her ankle and giving it a playful squeeze. “What can I say? I aim to please.”

The room erupts into laughter, and I smile faintly, though my thoughts are elsewhere.

I can’t help but think about how Asher and I once joked that the pre-game is the best part of any party. “It’s where the real fun happens,” he’d said, leaning closer with that stupid grin of his, “before everyone gets too drunk to remember anything.”

But he’s not here.

“That’s so weird about Asher, though,” Brian says suddenly, pulling me back into the conversation.

I glance up, startled. “What’s weird about him?”

“That he’s the backup again,” Brian says, shaking his head. “Like, the guy’s a natural leader. Everyone loves him, and he’s the best player on the team. It just doesn’t make sense.”

“Coach has his reasons,” one of Brian’s friends pipes up, though his tone is skeptical.

“Yeah, but come on,” Brian continues. “Knox is the kind of guy you build a team around. He’s always got your back, always stays cool under pressure. Hell, he even helped me with that Calc assignment last semester, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him do anything half-assed.”

Jacklyn smirks, resting her chin on her hand. “You’ve got a bit of a man-crush there, Brian.”

He shrugs, grinning. “What can I say? The dude’s a legend.”

The words hit me harder than I expect, a bittersweet pang twisting in my chest. Brian’s right—Asheristhat guy. Steady, reliable, maddeningly charming. And yet, here I am, trying to convince myself that letting him go was the right call.

I glance down at my beer, swirling the amber liquid in the bottle as the conversation drifts to costume ideas and drinkspecials. The hollow ache in my chest grows heavier, and I take a long sip, hoping it’ll drown the feeling.

“You okay?” Jacklyn asks quietly, leaning in so only I can hear.

“Yeah,” I say automatically, forcing a smile. “Fine.”

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