Page 41 of It's Complicated

I can’t, I want to scream. I won’t.

“Please?”

And that’s all it takes for my good intentions to fly out the window. I drop the coffee cup on a nearby mayo stand and wrap my arms around her, pulling her close. She fits perfectly in my embrace. I drop my chin on top of her head, inhaling the sweet scent of her shampoo.

For a fleeting moment, everything feels right in the world. My heart beats faster against my chest as I hold her tight. I can feel her warmth seeping into me, making me forget about everything else.

But as soon as she pulls away and flashes me a smile, my doubts come rushing back. I’m just her friend, after all.

“Thank you,” she says, before heading off to take care of her patient.

I watch her go, feeling more confused than ever.

Maybe Mrs. Parker was right. Maybe I should just tell Lori how I feel. But what if it ruins our friendship? What if she doesn’t feel the same way?

And that’s not even a what if because I already know. She’s in love with Aiden. I need to drill that fact into my brain and stop imagining things that aren’t there.

I survived my feelings for over a decade, I can keep doing it. Even if now I have to pretend to love her while pretendingnotto love her.

But it gets impossible only when we’re with Aiden and I have to put on a show. And I’ve checked our schedules, they don’t exactly align for the next few weeks, which means not many lunches together. Kirsten keeps Aiden very busy with all the wedding planning so he’s not around the office to hang out that much.

The only truly dangerous moments are going to be the meet and greet for the wedding party Kirsten insisted on having for bridesmaids and groomsmen to get to know each other before the wedding. It’ll be at a cool bar slash club downtown. And then there’s the three-day bachelor party in New Orleans, where Lori will be joining the boys as she refused to attend the bachelorette—first time I ever saw her put her foot down so adamantly over something.

It’s easy, it’s only three nights. I can do it.

16

JACE

Two weeks later

It’s not easy and it’s not only three nights. Now that Kirsten is sure Lori isn’t after her man, she’s constantly inviting us out.

It was lunch last week. I spent the whole time in a booth with Lori’s side pressed into mine, one arm draped over her shoulder as I twirled a lock of her silky hair around my finger. I just couldn’t help myself, now that I briefly get permission to touch her, I can’t control the impulses. And Lori didn’t help things along. Throughout the lunch she kept leaning into me, shooting me these looks, with her big brown eyes sparkling up at me.

Then it was another dinner out and a casual outing at the movies. And I swear, it took all the self-restraint I had not to pull a move on her in the dark movie theater while she snuggled against me for the entire duration of the action flick.

Then came the weekend and another invitation to scout a new, posh rooftop bar. Dark lighting, fancy cocktails, and Lori in a dress. A recipe for disaster in short.

I swear sometimes it feels like she’s doing it on purpose. I’m not used to seeing her in sexy clothes. And maybe it’s a last-ditcheffort to seduce Aiden before the wedding, but the way she looks at me sometimes, like she’s trying to tell me something without saying a word, drives me crazy. But I’ve no idea what she’s trying to say, if anything. We don’t talk much. Other than when we have to pretend in front of the others, I try to avoid her as much as possible.

But having her so close while still keeping my distance is chipping away my soul one stolen touch at the time.

Well, at least I managed not to kiss her again.

But tonight is the first real test. The meet and greet for the wedding party. An entire night in a club with loud music, too many drinks, not enough inhibition, and too much temptation.

It’s okay. I can do it.

When I take a cab to the club downtown, it’s already past the agreed meet time. But arriving as late as possible without passing for a total douche is part of my survival strategy. Even shedding a mere half an hour of pretending off my sentence will do great things for my mental health.

Yeah, who am I kidding? The moment I enter the club, my eyes immediately snatch onto Lori. She’s talking to Aiden’s brother, a cocktail in her hands, her head tilted backward as she laughs.

Her hair is up in a high ponytail. No dress tonight. Just black jeans and a plain tank top, which in a way is worse. Because this is the Lori I fell in love with, the goofball who wears minimal makeup and dresses comfortably. And my heart aches when I think about how I will never have her.

Mrs. Parker’s words play in my head,“If you love her, tell her.”

What the heck, maybe I should just tell her.

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