Page 33 of Love & Rockets

“Please do.”

The retort earned him a self-deprecating chuckle. “So polite. Even when a woman dangles the prospect of sex in front of you, then yanks it away.”

Jake inhaled deeply then fell back in his seat. He gave his neck a tired roll and reached for the ignition. “Yep. That’s me. Two more miracles and they make me a saint.”

A surge of panic clogged her throat as the engine purred to life. Unable to manage more than an unintelligible cry, she grabbed his hand before he could reach for the gear shift. Their eyes met and held, hers searing hot with the threat of tears, his dark and dejected. “No. Don’t.”

He stared at her, his usually expressive face disturbingly blank. “Darla, I didn’t really eat, and spent most of my day having impure thoughts, so my brain’s a little muddled. I’m trying real hard to be a good guy here, but I’m really about done with the mixed signals, okay?”

“No more mixed signals,” she promised in a rush.

They sat there, the two of them suspended in some kind of bubble made out of want and confusion. “What do you want me to do?” he asked at last.

“I don’t want you to take me home.”

“That isn’t what I asked.”

Biting her bottom lip, she turned her hand over and pressed her palm to his. “I want this. You. But I need to make sure we understand each other first.”

“I have to say, we’re not off to a good start on that score.”

She conceded the point with a weak smile, then gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “No, but let me give it another shot.” Pulling their clasped hands into her lap, she took a steeling breath. “What you said before, about you and me being separate from Grace? My life is complicated. You see, Gracie and I, we’re a team.” She raised a shoulder in a helpless shrug. “She’s the most important person in the world to me.”

“Any idiot with eyes can see that.”

“Right, but that fact hasn’t always sat well with some of the idiots I’ve dated.”

“Darla, I knew you before you had a kid.”

“Yes, but not really.” She flashed a wan smile. “I mean, yeah, we knew each other, but not like we do now, and definitely not like we’re about to know each other.”

The exaggerated leer she added at the end might have been overkill, but it was hard to tell with a guy like Jake. Steel trap mind or not, pinpointing the bits he might cue was challenging to say the least. Thankfully, he rolled his eyes to let her know the added emphasis wasn’t needed.

“What I’m trying to tell you is I learned a long time ago not to mix the two.” The befuddled frown came back, and she hastened to clarify. “Gracie and the guys I date. If we do this, you and I, our…thing has to be even more separate from you and Grace than I think you’re thinking.”

“Two post-graduate degrees and I’m having a hard time unraveling this chain of logic,” he murmured, searching her eyes. “Can you tell me what I need to know?”

“What I was trying to tell you earlier.” Darla released his hand. “My life is very complicated. I like to keep this part simple. Very simple. No strings. No promises. We don’t have to waste our time together trying to do date-y things because, trust me, we’re not going to have a lot of time alone together.”

The crevice between his brows deepened. “Are you saying you want this to be about sex?”

“I’m saying mapping out our expectations up front will probably be better for everyone. That way, we start out on the same page.”

“The just-sex page.”

“I don’t see any reason to confuse things. You said you want me. I want you, too. If we agree we won’t be taking my daughter miniature golfing or having sleepovers at my house, this will be simpler. Even if she isn’t there. That’s Grace’s space, and I can’t risk her getting hurt.”

“And you automatically assume I’ll hurt her?”

His voice was flat and dull, all richness lost. The hollowness in his tone made her heart ache, but she was no stranger to that particular malady. Her heart had been bruised, battered and broken by the people she should have been able to trust most. She’d survived worse. She could survive the loss of Jake Dalton when all was said and done.

Dropping her own voice to a whisper, she touched his arm gently. “I know you wouldn’t mean to, Jake, but it’s possible. Please understand, I’m not saying this to upset you or implying you’re anything less than a stand-up guy. I have to protect Gracie. She’s all I have.”

“Protect her from me.”

“No, from me,” she corrected. “A girl doesn’t get knocked up in high school without having a few fairly serious impulse control issues, you know.” Her lame attempt at a joke fell flat, so she went straight to the unvarnished truth. “I’ve always had a weakness for you.”

She had a hard time not laughing at the stunned look on his face. The man looked like she’d told him she liked to go skinny dipping with alligators.

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