Page 55 of Knot Happening

“Head west. Turn left at the third light,” I direct my driver, before raising the privacy screen.

I should continue my drive home. Take the meds. Suffer the injection.

But fuck that. Fuck always doing what I think I should… I want her, and she clearly wants me.

Tatum

After I left work, Hayden drove me home, ignoring my protests. Obviously.

I took a shower, but couldn’t be bothered to put clothes on, before the gnawing void in my heart started nagging me.

Now here I am, in my empty apartment, thinking of everything Declan said to me tonight. I clutch the pendant I stole from his desk in my palm. It can’t be sentimental, if there was a tag on it still, right? He wasn't wearing it…

Instead of being rational, I scramble into my closet. Ever since taking my suppressants, the need to nest was non-existent. Lately, though, it’s been creeping up on me. I grab my treasure box, the new one that’s much bigger now, and head to the back of the walk in space.

I’m tossing clothes, shoes, and purses out of the way so I can make the space the right size for what I need.

Then, I grab one of the new blankets I recently purchased and toss it to the floor. I add Kodiak’s shirt, and Hayden’s hoodie to the pile, and then, I dump out my treasure box.

I grab the beer bottle from Easton, and place the bracelet I stole from him around the top, then lay it carefully at the edge of my new nest.

Next I lay out the pendant, wishing I had Declan’s bracelet still too. I sift through the things I've taken from strangers,or stores, and put those back into my box. Now I’m left with everything I took from Hayden, all those years ago. I pile those up, stuff them in the corner, just outside the edge of my nest.

When I finally lay down, I curl up in a ball with my towel still wrapped around me. Breathing in the faint scents of Hayden and Kodiak, wishing I had Declan and even Easton’s scents to help soothe me. I attempt to let my Omega instincts settle.

It doesn’t help. A tear slips down my cheek, and I swipe it away angrily.

Despite my better judgment telling me that this is a wildly terrible idea, the needy black hole in my chest makes me do it anyway.

Tatum: So how strict is that no texting rule? Can you not talk to me at all?

I’m so fucking lonely, and I have no one else to talk to. He’s the one that opened this hole inside me. The one that sparked my desire to be…noticed. Wanted.

Maybe it was seeing Hayden again, everywhere I fucking turn, that magnified all these needy, desperate emotions. Or maybe it was Easton’s sweetness. His gentle kindness. Or maybe it was Kodiak, and the way he lit the fuse on the slowly burning fire inside me, either way, here I am. Texting my boss. In the middle of the night.

Declan: Depends on what you want to talk about. For example, it would be extremely unprofessional to talk about my curiosity when it comes to the taste of your pussy.

“Jesus…” I whimper as I roll onto my stomach, staring at his words for a moment as my core warms and a demandingheat pulses between my thighs. I pull my lip between my teeth, feeling my cheeks blush as I consider my reply.

This feels forbidden. Like we’re doing something very wrong by talking like this, and I don’t know why that’s turning me on, but I can’t deny the energy swirling inside me.

Tatum: So I shouldn’t say I think about the size of your cock, and how it compares to the knot vibrator.

I must be losing my fucking mind, because I have never been the kind of Omega that enjoys talking about sex. I’m shy, and completely fucking inexperienced. I’ve spent one heat with an Alpha, and that was... Most of it was a blur.

Most.

But not all. I remember the way he touched me. The way he kissed my skin like he wanted to worship every inch of me. How his fingers felt as he slid them gently inside me…

Fuck, these are dangerous thoughts.

Declan: Naughty Omega. Have you ever taken a knot that size? When was the last time you made yourself come?

Tatum: Not that size…and I haven’t done that.

Declan: You don’t get yourself off?

Tatum: No. I…don’t know how to make it feel good.

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