Dozer
I sat alone in the playhouse. Holding my phone, I reread the text from Romeo.
Romeo: Get over here. She misses you.
I missed her, but I wasn’t going to go over there and pretend I didn’t just have the worst fucking day of my life. Watch her laugh and smile with Romeo, just to want to drown her in my misery. I’d done that last night. I’d suffocated her spark.
I leaned my head back against the old building.
“I’ve been looking for you.”
Romeo approached and sat next to me.
“When did you get back?”
I figured he’d be balls deep in Pippa. My gut churned as if it had anything left in it to hurl.
“Blade stopped over at Pippa’s. Of course, she’s going to ask where you were. Everyone was there.”
“Don’t start with me, Romeo. I’m not good company.”
“You’re never good company. Fuck dude, she’s playing nice with Levi because of you.”
“Levi won’t play nice with her.”
“She did because she can’t stand to see you like this either.”
“Alone, quiet—”
“Nah, that we expect. You’re on the edge.” Romeo rested his wrists on his bent knees, his hands hanging limp. “Do you think I’m judging you?”
I didn’t reply. To say no would be a lie. To say anything else would reveal my insecurities.
“I’ve played it out in my head a thousand times,” Romeo said. “How I’d feel with you in theroom with us. I’d be inside her, but she’d be thinking of you. Then you’d get inside her, and she’d still be thinking about you. I wonder if I’m in her head anywhere or if I’m a prop.”
“You’re not a prop. She told me she wouldn’t cheat on you.” And I still tried to get into her head.
“She’s not mine, Doze. Her being with you wouldn’t be cheating. Her being with me isn’t cheating on you. We both want to fuck her, but I know you want more.”
“I’ve thought about it,” I confessed.
“That’s the problem.” He sighed. “With her, it’s different.”
I squinted into the distance. I had a war inside my head. I got off on watching, but I needed more with her. “I think about you making her come. Your name on her lips. Your scent on her body.”
“When I fucked her out here, she was thinking of you. If it had been anyone else, I’m not sure I’d be okay with it. But we’ve been here before. I didn’t tell Pip you’ve watched me with Kiss.”
I bowed my head.
“You want Pippa to smell like me.” Romeo turned toward me. “Answer me this. And know that I love you. I don’t care. Nothing changes with us. We can’t control who we’re attracted to. Is this about Pip or is this about me?”
I growled and rubbed my hand over my head. “Romeo, it’s about her. Only about her.”
“Good.” He let out a breath. “When I’m fucking her in front of you, I want to make sure it’s about her pussy and not my dick. Because when you fuck her infront of me, I’m not just going to watch. If you’re in her pussy, I’m going to be in her mouth.”
“Christ. I’m obsessed with her, Romeo. I can’t stop thinking about her.”
He leaned back. “She wants you, too. Do want to share her?”