Page 137 of Blue

Jalen in superhero little boy underwear. Jalen in the bath. Jalen on his hands and knees with his bottom to the camera. His life in photos. My best friend. I scanned to the last photo. Faded jeans hung from his thin hips. His hair hung to his shoulders. Long hair got the girls. Everything was the best friend I remembered, except his broken expression.

He had to be sixteen. About the time I’d told my sister. About the time he turned his back on me. When the truth had unleashed a monster. I closed my eyes, but the tears still spilled onto my cheeks.

“Who is it?” Cruz quietly asked.

“Jalen.” I could barely speak the word. Everything inside me shattered.

Everything I’d believed had been a lie.

I wanted to ask why me? What had he done to Jalen? Why were there no more pictures after this one? But I was afraid of the answers. And they didn’t really matter. Like me, Jalen was just trying to survive.

“Delete the file,” I said to Cruz.

I shifted my gaze from Carl to the photo of my sister, Jalen, and their little boy.

“What’s his name?”

Carl’s jaw clenched.

“What’s his name?” I demanded.

“His name is Matthew. We call him Matt. Does that make you happy?”

For reasons I’d explore later, it did. Maybe giving their kid my middle name was a way of saying he was sorry. Because Jalen had known the truth but lied for his father. Lied because the same shit was happening to him.

Cruz leaned back in the chair. “What do you want me to do?”

Bullet stabbed his cigarette out in the tree, pocketed the butt, and leaned over the desk. “You’re the IT expert. You tell me. How do we get this shit to the authorities?”

“Listen,” Carl said. “You don’t want to do that.”

“Oh, I do,” Cruz said. “Once I disseminate your collection to the appropriate law enforcement agencies, I’m going to make sure everyone on both your business and personal contact list knows you’re a sick fuck.”

Carl choked and babbled more excuses. “Those guys don’t want their sexual history out in the public. Brantley, think about the others.”

“Sexual history?” I snapped. “You’re a predator, looking at a five-year minimum on each count.” I narrowed my eyes, glaring at him. “Fuck you. I’m going to sleep well at night knowing you’re going to die in prison.”

“You think you can walk away from this,” he said, moaning as he staggered to his feet.

“Sit the fuck down.” Rogue forced him back into his chair.

“Nothing changes,” Carl continued. “I’ve lived in your head since you were a boy, and I’ll be there until you’re dead.”

“Probably. But instead of being afraid because of the shit you’ve done. I’ll smile knowing your life is fucked. You lose your money, your family, your fucking freedom. And I walk away knowing you’ll never touch Matt.”

And I could live with that. Jalen and my sister would never know what I’d done for them, but that was okay. Jalen hadn’t been able to protect me. We were just kids. But I could protect his secret, and I sure as fuck could keep Carl from ever having the opportunity to groom my sister’s kid.

“We need to wrap this up,” Bullet said. In another few minutes, the majority of employees would be filtering in for work. “Write the email.”

“To my friends and family,”Cruz said as he typed.“I’m a sick fuck.”He glanced at Carl and smiled. “You wouldn’t say that.” He hit the delete button then started again.“I’m writing to you because I’ve used threats and intimidation to hide the vile and heinous things I’ve done. Today, I have begun the process of making amends to my victims. A package has been delivered to the authorities documenting my crimes.”

“Sounds good,” Rogue said. “Keep going.”

“I’ll be surrendering myself to the appropriate authorities. I won’t make excuses. The things I’ve done, I’ve done without thought to the people I’ve hurt. I’m not asking for forgiveness.”Cruz’s fingers tapped along the keyboard.“To my family. I’m sorry for subjecting you to the scrutiny and accusations that will certainly come from the exposure of my crimes. I am the only one to blame.”

I glared at Carl. “We’re going to send that email to everyone you know, everyone who has ever had contact with you personally or professionally. Your life is ruined. How does it feel to go from being honored at the City Gala awards to know you’re never going to take a shit in private again? Everyone will know you’re a sick fucking monster.”

Cruz spun on his chair. “Shit’s about to hit the fan.” He hit the enter key on the keyboard. “You have about five minutes before everyone in this building is going to know the truth. I’d give it a couple hours, and your bank accounts will be frozen, and the cops are going to be at your door.”

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