Page 84 of Blue

Sully tossed a nickel into the pile on the table. “Early days, Blue. You gotta have patience.” He flipped over his cards. “Both with her,” he glanced to the door as Blade came in with Hana, “with your club, and with your prez.”

Sully dealt me into the next hand and tossed a handful of coins in front of me. Hellers filtered into the club. The bar was busy, and I wanted out. But I took Sully’s advice, stayed, and played a few hands of poker. Once I’d lost my pile of coins, I migrated out to the oil drum and gave a two-finger wave goodbye to Rogue and Bullet.

Relief rushed through me when I pulled into the driveway. I’d run later than I expected. I headed into the house and grabbed a quick shower.

Where the fuck was she? I checked the time again. Earlier she’d wanted to spend time with other NA people. Maybe they’d gone out for food again. I grabbed a beer out of the refrigerator. I stared at the label as the cold bottle grew heavy in my palm. Not this time. I put it back in the fridge, went outside, and waited for her on the bottom step.

Just as I was about to send a text, a car turned into the driveway.

My gut sank and the bitter taste of jealousy crawled into my throat and floated across my tongue. My words to Cruz replayed through my mind.

I was going to lose the best thing in my life.

Kiss sat in the front seat with a guy with a handlebar mustache. He had to be about thirty. He put the car into park but didn’t turn off the engine. Pivoting toward Kiss, he smiled, and his lips were moving. I couldn’t hear what he said, but Kiss evidently liked what she heard. She covered her mouth with her hand and laughed.

Neither had noticed me sitting on the stairs. I leaned forward and rested my forearms on my thighs. But I couldn’t turn away.

What the fuck was he saying to her?I can help you stay clean. I want to be your sponsor. I want to split your legs, eat your sweet cunt, cram you full of my hard cock, and make you scream my name.

A hot and nearly lethal dose of panic slipped through my veins. I’d choke on my own fucking fear before I’d lose her to my pathetic fucking issues. Mind over matter.

The passenger door opened. She still laughed, said goodbye, and waved as the guy backed out of the driveway.

“Blue.” The smile fell from her lips as she approached.

“Who is the guy? Is that your sponsor?”

“Not my sponsor. His name is Ansel. I don’t know what I’d call him. I think he’s a psychologist, but I didn’t hear anyone call him doctor. I don’t even know his last name.”

“But you got into a car with him?” I bit back the hard edge of my tone.

“Are you mad?”

Not mad, rather consumed with jealousy. I wanted her to smile and laugh with me. Not even heroin had blackened our relationship the way my issue had.

“I was worried about you.” I wrapped my arms around her, held her close, and inhaled the sweet scent of her perfume. The silky strands of her golden hair caressed my cheek. Her arms wound around me.

She tipped her head back to stare into my face. “Jazzy’s car wouldn’t start.”

I stroked my thumb along her neck. “Why didn’t you call me?”

“I was going to, but I would’ve been alone in the parking lot while I waited. Ansel offered to give me a ride. He lives five minutes away. He even offered to pick me up tomorrow for the morning meeting.”

“I’ll take you.”

She smiled. “That’s what I told him.” We laced our fingers and walked into the house. “I’m hungry. Do you want to order a pizza?”

I still had a couple of bucks. “Whatever you want.”

“A large pepperoni with extra cheese.” She wagged her brows. “And a shower.”

I followed her into her bedroom. Before I had the door closed, she had her shirt over her head.

“My sponsor’s name is Janie.” She reached behind her back and unhooked her bra. “I’d have you meet her tomorrow, but she won’t be there. She’ll be back on Monday. She’s going to spend the weekend with her family.” Kiss kept talking from the bathroom as she started the shower. “I guess her dad is super rich. He gave her a Porche for her sixth month of sobriety. Georgia, she’s in recovery too, she said Janie has a toxic relationship with her dad. They fight a lot.”

“What does a sponsor do?” I sat on the bed and pulled up the delivery app for pizza.

“I’m supposed to call her if I have the urge to use.” Kiss came back to the doorway, unsnapped her jeans, and pushed them over her hips. “I exchanged numbers with Georgia, too.” She smiled. “She ate a lot of cookies. I thought it was funny until Ryatt told me that sometimes all she had to eat were the cookies at meetings.”

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