Page 11 of Blue

“No, shit. He’s your fucking problem. Not mine.” Sam tied off a tourniquet on his arm. “Get rid of him.”

The barrel of the needle was still full. I remember when I’d have been angry that he’d reserved most of the shot for himself.

“Open the fucking door.” Blue banged again. Before I could react, the wood splintered, and the door crashed against the wall.

Cruz was right behind him.

“I warned you.” Blue’s knee slammed into Sam, crashing him to the bathroom floor. With a hard thrust, he kicked Sam in the side, kicked in his ribs, and kicked his gut. Curses and spittle flew from his mouth.

Cruz yanked Blue back before he could stomp on Sam’s head. “Not like this.” He pushed Blue toward me. “Take care of Kiss.”

“You won’t give her what she wants,” Sam said, curling on his side to protect his ribs. “But she’ll suck your dick for a hit.”

Time seemed to slow. Blue was suddenly all I could see, leaning over me, suffocating the air around me with his anger. His gaze flickered from me to the needle on the counter. A tinge of my blood stained the liquid inside.

“This is what you want.” His voice was low and barely controlled. His beautiful blue eyes pierced mine. “You like to suck guys off for a high.” He ripped his beltfrom his jeans. “It must feel fucking amazing.” He strapped the belt around his arm. “Do you want to give me my wings?”

He’d want me to shoot him up for the first time? My brain tried to process his words.

“I’m sick of feeling like shit, too. Sick of the fucked up thoughts in my head.” He pumped his fist. Veins plumped and swelled in his arm. “You think you’re the only one with demons? Black makes everything better, right? Maybe it can fix me.”

Understanding finally seeped into my muddled thoughts. I scrambled onto my knees. “Stop.”

“Get the fuck out if you don’t want to watch.” He pushed me aside. “Take her,” he said to Cruz. Without looking at me, he grabbed the needle.

“No. Blue don’t.” I grabbed onto his arm, digging my nails into his flesh to loosen the belt. “Stop,” I pleaded. “You don’t want this.”

“You think I don’t want to escape my fucking problems? I promise, you don’t have shit on me when it comes to being fucked up.” He tapped his temple. “I want out of here, Kiss. I’m fucking done.”

Blue shoved me toward Cruz. “Get her out of here!”

Cruz gripped my arms and dragged me through the door. I kicked and bucked to break his hold. “Don’t, Blue, please.”

His eyes met mine. “How does it feel, Kiss? You get to see me fucked up.”

“I can’t.” I hiccupped on a sob. “I care about you so much. Please don’t do this.” I swallowed the regrets tasting bitter on my tongue. To see him high on heroin would destroy me.

“Yeah, it sucks to care. But I give zero fucks what you want.” He turned away from me and the needle slid into his arm.

A scream ripped from my lungs, and I crashed to my knees. “I’m sorry.”

Oh god. Was this how he felt to see me high? Pain bled through my veins. The hollow space where my heart was supposed to beat became a dark cavernous hole.

I’d done this. With a needle to my arm, I’d murdered the little I had left inside me. The piece that Blue had cared about. The only piece that didn’t want to be a junkie.

Cruz pulled me into the hall and dropped me to the ground.

“Stop him.” Tears soaked my face. “Please.”

“Keep her away from the door,” Cruz said to Kane and then went back into the bathroom.

Kane led me into the bedroom. “He doesn’t have a gun to his head. It’s his choice. You know how it is, Kiss.”

“No, he’s angry.” If he wanted to hurt me the way I’d hurt him, he had. I sagged to the ground, wanting to die, wanting to turn back the clock.

One hit and I’d been lost. Black became my best friend. For a while, black made me feel good. Blue was feeling the first rush of warmth, the smooth slide into nirvana, and the intense pleasure. But then he would meet the dragon, and he’d fight a war he’dneverwin because he’dneverfeel this good again.

He wouldneverstop chasing the high. Nothing else would be good enough.

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